


Dominance

by fanfic814



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Bottom Dean, Car Sex, Dean in Panties, Dom Drop, Fluff and Smut, Gags, Grace Kink, Grace Sex, Gratuitous Smut, Light BDSM, Light Bondage, Light Dom/sub, M/M, Mildly Dubious Consent, Panties, Praise Kink, Prostate Massage, Restraints, Rimming, Spanking, Top Castiel, Top Castiel/Bottom Dean Winchester, Top Drop, Toppy!Cas, did I mention smut?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-20
Updated: 2016-06-22
Packaged: 2018-05-22 01:04:49
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 19
Words: 38,337
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6065028
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fanfic814/pseuds/fanfic814
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Cas barely recognized himself when he looked in the mirror these days.  Where he used to be strong and confident, he now felt weak and full of doubts.    He longed for the days he felt powerful and in control, when angels obeyed his every command.  Not that he abused his power, but he missed the feeling of being revered and respected. Lately he felt more like a lost puppy than the fierce angel warrior he once was.  He was no longer Castiel, Angel of the Lord.  Now he was just... Cas.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Cas barely recognized himself when he looked in the mirror these days.  Where he used to be strong and confident, he now felt weak and full of doubts.    He longed for the days he felt powerful and in control, when angels obeyed his every command.  Not that he abused his power, but he missed the feeling of being revered and respected. Lately he felt more like a lost puppy than the fierce angel warrior he once was.  He was no longer Castiel, Angel of the Lord.  Now he was just...  _Cas_.

More and more lately, he found himself lashing out over trivial things.   For one, he was sick and tired of Dean's bullshit. For years, Dean had been eye-sexing him across the room, peppering him with little touches, and downright _flirting_ with him, but lately that had all increased tenfold. Still, Dean wasn't about to make a move. He was such a stubborn bastard, clinging to some irrational human fear about his sexuality that Cas would never understand.  Every time Dean would put a hand on his shoulder or give him a meaningful look, Cas would have to walk away before he snapped at him.  He couldn't help it.  He was just so frustrated, in more ways than one.

Cas had been helping out on a job in Boise, Idaho the night Dean's little secret came out.  Sam had gone out for a run, leaving the two of them alone in the motel.  
  
 Dean had just stepped out of the shower when he realized he hadn't brought his clean underwear into the bathroom. If Sam had been there, he would have just walked out and grabbed them. They were brothers, after all, and they'd lived in tight spaces together since they were kids, so it wasn't a big deal.  But he was sure as hell not gonna go out there naked with Cas in the room. He wasn't even sure he wanted to go out in a towel. After all,there are some friendship lines you just don't cross."Hey Cas, " he called. "Can you do me a favor? "

"Of course. What can I do for you, Dean? "

"Can you grab the boxers out of my bag and hand them to me? They're right on top." He stuck his arm out the door expectantly.

He heard Cas unzip the bag and begin to root through it.

"Right on top, Cas," Dean wearily repeated.

Cas shoved the pair of underwear into his waiting hand and Dean continued drying off.

"Hey Dean?" Cas yelled from the bedroom area.

" What?"

"Why do you have a pink plastic phallus in your bag?"

Dean nearly choked on his own saliva. "What?" He slipped his shorts on and tore into the bedroom. "What the fuck, Cas? Why are you touching that?" he yelled angrily. His face was burning in embarrassment. He'd completely forgotten that was in there.

"I was just curious. It's an unusual trinket. But it has straps... Do you wear it?  Is it a fertility amulet of some sort? " Cas twisted the base and he jolted in surprise as it whirred to life.

"Jesus, Cas! Give me that, " he demanded.

Cas grudgingly handed it over. "Why are you so angry? I'm sorry I found your phallic amulet, but it was right under your shorts."

"It's not a amulet, Cas. Fuck."

"Well I must admit I'm glad to hear that. I'm not sure Sam would leave you alone if you began wearing a pink penis around your neck."

Dean sighed and stuffed the object back in his bag.

"So what is it? " Cas asked, sincerely interested in his new-found discovery.

"Not something I wanna talk about, Cas," Dean warned.

Cas's face fell, as it usually did when Dean snapped at him.  "Oh. I understand," he said.  "I guess I can ask Sam later."

"No!" Dean blurted. "Do _not_ tell Sam about this! It's... it's something embarrassing," he mumbled.

Cas cocked his head and narrowed his eyes, thinking hard about what it could possibly be used for.

Dean sighed dramatically. "It's for..." he paused. "Sexual gratification purposes."

Cas 's eyes widened as he the pieces started to click into place. "Oh.  What are the straps for?

Dean covered his face with one hand and closed his eyes.  He couldn't believe he was sitting here explaining strap-ons to Cas.  "It's a harness. Sometimes I'll let a girl strap it on and use it on me," he muttered. "And that's _way_ more than you need to know about that, so let's not talk about it."

"Okay," Cas said tentatively.

The look on Cas's face was driving Dean crazy.  He could just see the wheels turning in his head and Cas was practically twitching to hold himself back from speaking again.

"What is it?" Dean sighed.

"If you enjoy using the phallus, why not just seek sexual gratification with men?"

"I...  Uh..." Dean fumbled.  He could feel his face reddening once again.  "Fuck.  It's not that easy, Cas."

"Why not?"

"It's just not!" Dean grumbled.  "Are you done giving me the third degree now?"

Cas shrugged.  "I guess. Except..."

Dean groaned and threw his head back in frustration.

"Why do you have a dog collar?"

"Fuck.  Cas, this is personal shit, man!"

Cas lowered his head. "I'm sorry, Dean.  I was just curious."

"I know, I know," Dean sighed.  "Fine.  Sometimes I'm into a little kinky shit."

Cas frowned.  "Like nurse role-play and light domination?"

Dean snorted in laughter.  "I forgot, you've watched porn. Uh.  Yeah.  Minus the nurse-part.  But a little light BDSM, spanking, restraints... I'm into it."

"I see..."

"Are we done now?  Remember, no talking about this in front of Sam."

"Of course, Dean."

Cas lay awake next to Dean that night, feeling even grumpier.  Whenever they shared a hotel room, he got stuck sleeping next to Dean, because Sam was all arms and legs when he slept.  He didn't even _need_ to sleep, but it was better than sitting around waiting for them to wake up.  Besides, Dean thought it was 'creepy' when Cas sat up watching him sleep.   
  
It was unfortunate, because he really loved to watch Dean while he slept.  He loved the way Dean snuggled with his pillow, the way he made content little noises every so often.  He loved the way his eyelids fluttered when he was in the midst of a good dream.  He loved observing the way his entire body relaxed.  Dean walked around in a constant state of tension sometimes, so watching him sleep peacefully always made Cas happy. Unfortunately, right now, even that couldn't elevate his mood.

He just couldn't understand why Dean was _so_ damn stubborn.  It was obvious that he was interested.  Apparently it wasn't even the sex-thing scaring him away. He thought back to all of the bad porn he'd seen, and marveled at the fact that Dean was into such kinky things.  He knew porn wasn't realistic, but still, Dean had admitted that he liked being spanked and restrained... Cas groaned a little just thinking about it.  The first porn he ever saw contained spanking, and for some reason he found it incredibly arousing.  He closed his eyes and imagined Dean bent over his knee... with his arms handcuffed behind his back... and maybe with his tie stuffed in his mouth...  Cas bit down on his lip hard to keep from moaning out loud.  He really needed to do more research on this BDSM thing.  If he could just get Dean to start being honest with himself, there might be a way he could indulge Dean's kinks while appeasing his own need for dominance as well... 


	2. Chapter 2

Cas awoke to Dean snuggling into his side with an arm wrapped around his waist. He had blinked away at some point during the night, doing a little research in another dimension for a while while the hunters slept, returning only a second later in their time. They had never even noticed he was gone.

Sam was already out on yet another early morning run, so Cas decided it might be fun to tease Dean a bit. He turned his head and gently nuzzled at his hair, making Dean sigh happily.

"Dean, " he whispered.

Dean just grunted in response.

Cas lovingly ran a few fingers through his hair and Dean's grip tightened around him as he made a happy little squeak.

"What are you doin', Cas? " Dean suddenly mumbled.

Cas froze. "N...nothing," he stammered.

"Like when you touch me there, " Dean breathed.

"What?" Cas asked, completely confused. But Dean didn't answer. He was asleep.

"Ohhh Cas, " Dean moaned.

Cas was intrigued, but he was also annoyed. Now Dean was having dirty dreams about him? He couldn't take this anymore.

"Dean, " he commanded in a firm voice.

Dean jerked awake, drawing back quickly when he realized he was snuggling up to Cas. "Sorry, " he muttered.

"What the hell was that?" Cas demanded.

"What? What are you talking about? I was asleep until a second ago for chrissake!"

"Think hard, Dean. What were you dreaming about?" Cas said, shooting him his best smoldering gaze.  For emphasis, he slowly licked his lips.  

Dean rubbed his eyes and blinked hard, trying to figure out what the hell Cas was rattling on about. He'd been dreaming about... Oh. Shit. "What did I say?" he asked nervously.

"I'm sure you can figure it out. What's going on with you, Dean?"  he breathed.  Quickly he reminded himself to calm down.  His dominant streak was coming out already and he didn't want to scare Dean off.  At the same time, after years of frustration, he just wanted to shake some sense into him. _To hell with it; if Dean wasn't going to make a move, he'd do it himself._  He suddenly lunged forward, shoving Dean down onto his back, pinning his body underneath his own.

"What the fuck?" Dean yelled, trying to push him off, forgetting that Cas was ridiculously strong.

Cas just lay there, staring him down and making Dean uncomfortable enough that he had to look away.

"Sick of your shit, Dean," Cas growled, turning Dean's face back toward his own.  Slowly, the Seraph's confidence was building, and so was the need to assert himself.  "I can hear your pulse quicken every time I'm close to you.  I can see your face flush.  I can smell your arousal.  You want me."

Dean lay there quivering beneath him.  "What?  What the hell are you talking about?"

" _Really_?" Cas said, raising a brow in disapproval.  "You're aroused right _now._ "

Dean's eyes were wide, and he whimpered in the back of his throat. "What are you doing, Cas?"

"Admit it," Cas demanded.

"Cas..."

Cas slotted his thigh between Dean's legs, pressing against his erection and Dean moaned loudly.  His eyes closed as he bit his lip and rubbed against Cas's leg.

Cas practically purred in response.  "Good boy," he rasped.

Dean seemed to come alive with Cas's praise, finally letting his body relax as Cas leaned forward to kiss a trail up his neck.

"Tell me, Dean," Cas whispered in his ear.  "Tell me you want me."

"Y...yeah.   I... Fuck!  I want you," Dean gasped, his hips now moving automatically as he rode Cas's leg.  Dean was reeling, wondering when the hell Cas became so demanding.  He was somewhere between 'fearful' and 'more turned on than he had ever been in his entire life'.  This was not his mild-mannered friend Cas.  This was the snarly Castiel he'd met in the barn all those years ago.  And _holy fucking shit_ , it was hot.

"Mmm," Cas smirked.  "That wasn't so difficult now, was it?  Listen to me, Dean.  I'm tired of your games.  You're going to be honest with me from now on.  And if you are, I will take care of you in ways you never even imagined."

Dean was trembling with _need_.  He was getting close just humping Cas's damn leg.  "Fuckin' hell, Cas..."

"Collaring, spanking, whatever you need," Cas continued.  "But I require complete obedience."

Dean swallowed hard.  Was Cas really saying what he thought he was saying?  Because he'd fantasized about that for a long time.  Hell, every time he let a girl fuck him with that strap-on, he thought about Cas... he'd never admit that out loud, of course, but...

"What do you say, Dean?" Cas interrupted his chain of thought, and Dean wrapped his arms around him, gripping him tightly as his orgasm tore through him. Cas covered his mouth with his own, both to kiss and quiet him, and Dean kissed back with reckless abandon, all those years of denial suddenly seemed wasted in this moment as Cas's tongue pillaged his mouth.

Cas pulled away, still looking firm and in control, while Dean was sure he looked like a hot mess.   He was still trembling and panting, his forehead coated in a light sheen of sweat, and to top it off, he had just jizzed in his damn pants.

"What the hell was that? " Dean asked breathlessly.

"Exactly what I said it was, " Cas said matter-of-factly.   "But you didn't answer my question."

" What? "

"Can you be good for me,  Dean?" Cas whispered in his ear.  He let his teeth sink into Dean's earlobe and he  tugged gently.  "Let me collar you.  Be my little pet...  I'll take such good care of you."

Dean's face was red and flushed as he gasped.  " Yeah.  Okay," he stammered.   "You wanna collar me?  Then let's play," he taunted, desperately trying to regain his usual stoic composure.

Cas's face twisted into a wicked smile.  "Good boy," he said, gently stroking Dean's hair.   "Rest now, Dean," he instructed. "We can discuss this more later."

Dean smiled a little, clearly enjoying the bit of praise. He let Cas wrap his arms around him and he breathed in deeply, surprised at Cas's fresh, earthy scent.  He'd never noticed it before, but to be fair, he'd never been quite this close either.  He wondered if all angels smelled like this.  He had a brief moment of panic as he lay there - what the hell was he _doing_? - but Cas's pheromones and his hands rubbing soothingly against his back quickly calmed him.

As Dean drifted back off to sleep, Cas used his power to clean him up so that the place didn't reek of sex and sweat when Sam came home.  He kissed his forehead again and Dean hummed happily.

That, Cas decided, was much easier than he thought it would be.


	3. Chapter 3

Cas had left after their little incident that night, and Dean hadn't seen him in a few days - Which was okay, since he and Sam had been excessively busy on a few jobs.  The last thing he wanted was for the two of them to be acting awkward in front of Sam.

It also gave Dean a lot of time to think, unfortunately. _What the hell had they done?  This was going to make things so confusing._   And it was going to be even more uncomfortable if Sam ever found out.  He silently cursed himself for always thinking with his dick.   
  
In the moment,  Cas getting all toppy on him was ridiculously hot.  But now that he could take a step back, the thought of Cas going all Dom on him was kind of scary. There was just something different about getting kinky with a guy, he decided.  Hell, he had barely even had time to admit to himself that he was into Cas... or guys in general.   It was going to take some time before he was comfortable with this.    
  
_What did Cas know about BDSM anyway?  Or sex, for that matter!_   He didn't even know what the collar was _for_ the night before.   Of course Dean was so out-of-his-mind horny at the time, he probably would have agreed to anything.  But maybe he needed to stop and think about this.  Hell, maybe Cas was thinking the same thing since he hadn't been around.

He didn't have long to sit and ponder, because that evening, Cas appeared in his bedroom.

"Hello, Dean."

"H...Hey, Cas," Dean said apprehensively, sitting up in his bed.

Cas smiled warmly as he stepped forward, fisting a hand in the front of his t-shirt and pulling him up toward him in a searing kiss.

"Fuck, " Dean mumbled, panting breathlessly. "Cas, we should probably talk about this. "

"What's to talk about, Dean? You either want to or you don't."

"Some things aren't that simple, " Dean sighed. "We've never done this before! And hell, I've never done any of this with a _guy_. Not to mention, you suddenly want to get all kinky and I'm not even sure you know what you're talking about, and..."

" You either want to or you don't, " Cas repeated calmly. "What do you want, Dean? "

" I... uh... " he was still panting as Cas gently pushed him back down on the bed. He already couldn't think straight. "I _want_... but we probably shouldn't be doing this..."

"Why not?"

"Because we're friends and um... this could make things awkward..."

Cas nodded and backed away, eliciting a long whine from Dean.  "Okay, Dean," he said.  "I would never try to coax you into something you didn't want to do..."

"No!" Dean exclaimed.  "I mean... maybe we can just take this a little slower?"

Cas smiled softly.  "Of course.  Come here," he said, lying down on the bed next to him.

Tentatively, Dean snuggled in close and Cas wrapped his arms around him.

"Are you okay? " Cas asked.

Dean nodded. "Maybe this is more confusing than I let on," he said sheepishly.

"What part are you confused about? " Cas asked, soothingly running his fingers through Dean's hair.

" _Every_ part. Fuck. Cas, I've been lying to myself for a long time. You were right. I _am_ attracted to you. And I know this isn't a big deal to angels, but figuring this shit out is difficult for humans sometimes. And as much as I kind of want you to just take me right here, it also scares the shit out of me."

"You're scared of me? " Cas asked, furrowing his brow.

"Not _of_ you. Of how I feel _about_ you. And no offense, but you come on pretty strong when you want something... Don't get me wrong. I wanted it, and it was hot as hell, but it was also kind of overwhelming."

"Oh," Cas said softly. He didn't really understand what Dean was so worried about, but it was clearly stressful to him. For one thing, Dean was talking about his feelings - a rare occurrence that Cas was not going to take lightly. "Well, we can take this as slowly as you need to," Cas assured him.  
  
Dean sighed as if a huge weight had been lifted from his shoulders.  Cas's lips brushed his forehead gently, and Dean made a contented hum.  "Thanks, Cas," he whispered sleepily.  
  
Cas was feeling pretty content now too.  More than anything, _this_ is what he had always wanted; Dean wrapped in his arms, snoring away.     
  
And right now, this was more than enough. 


	4. Chapter 4

Days passed with Cas slipping into Dean's bedroom each night. Though they both played it cool in front of Sam by day, Dean was getting used to Cas sleeping at his side.  In fact, he was starting to feel downright needy.   Still, every so often, things would start to get heated, and each time Dean would chicken out, withdrawing for a bit until Cas soothed him to sleep. For the life of him, he couldn't understand why this was so difficult. _It was just sex!_  Dean Winchester was a _big fan_ of casual sex.  The problem was, this was _Cas_ \- and their relationship was becoming anything but casual. And for some reason, that scared him.

Of course Cas was frustrated, but at least they were making progress. It wasn't even about the sex... well, not entirely, anyway. He was enjoying their new-found level of closeness, but Dean seemed to have a fear of being too intimate with him.   Anything beyond kissing and a little dry humping would scare him off.  Cas knew that it wasn't just  _him_ , Dean feared intimacy in general.  Not to mention, he was still working through having feelings for a _guy_ , which was obviously confusing for him.  Still, it was a little bit frustrating.

On the bright side, Dean seemed to be getting a little bolder each night. This evening, for example, as Cas lay there trying to sleep, he felt a sudden nibble on his earlobe.  He opened his eyes to see Dean shooting him a sly grin.  It was a small gesture, but since Cas usually had to initiate anything at all, it was also a big step.

Cas hummed happily as Dean started kissing his way down his neck. "What are _you_ up to?" he teased.

"Dunno," Dean mumbled in between kisses. "Just go with it."

"Gladly," Cas whispered. He coaxed Dean's mouth toward his own for a wet and dirty kiss, and Dean responded by crawling on top of him and practically devouring him.  Cas rolled them over, pinning Dean's body to the mattress with his own, and Dean arched his back wantonly.  

"You're good with your mouth, " Cas teased.

Dean's face flushed and a soft whimper escaped his throat. "So I've been told," he laughed nervously.

"Yeah? Maybe you'll have to show me sometime," Cas said casually.  
  
"Maybe I will," Dean flirted.    
  
"How about now?"  Cas just couldn't help himself - too many nights of being over-stimulated with no release were gnawing at him.  He wasn't going to pressure him of course, but there was no harm in asking, right?

Dean's breath had become eratic as he subconsciously licked his lips. "Um..."

Once again, Cas was feeling frisky and a little domineering as he watched Dean becoming more and more aroused. "You know you're curious, " he whispered in Dean's ear. "You do me, and then I return the favor... And I don't have a gag reflex..." he teased.

Dean blushed, a bit shyly.  "Deal."

A minute later he was kneeling between Cas's legs, staring anxiously at a very naked, very aroused Cas. This was the first time he'd seen him naked, hell, the first time he'd seen _any_ guy naked. Well, except for Sam. But they were brothers, and that was an accident!  This was different.

"What's wrong? " Cas asked.

"I... don't know if I can do this, " Dean said weakly.

"Well you know you don't have to, "Cas said softly.

"I want to. Just nervous, I guess?  It's so stupid..."

"Give me your hand," Cas whispered. He took Dean's hand and wrapped it around his dick.

Dean's eyes widened and his jaw dropped as he felt the strong, rock-hard flesh twitching beneath his fist.  He moaned softly and licked his lips again.  

"Good, " Cas breathed.

Tentatively Dean leaned forward and tongued over the glistening tip and Cas tried desperately not to thrust into him.

"You okay?" Cas whispered.

"Mmmhmm," Dean responded, slowly working his way down, taking Cas all into his mouth at once.  He gagged a little and pulled back immediately, feeling a little embarrassed.

"Shhh," Cas soothed, running his fingers through his hair.  "Don't hurt yourself. Just go easy."

Dean began slowly sliding his lips up and down the shaft as Cas made a strangled sound in his throat.

"Good boy," Cas encouraged, watching transfixed as Dean suddenly moaned and started bobbing his head faster.

Dean  was clearly enjoying himself already, sliding his tongue down the length of him and teasingly flicking against the slit. He tilted his head up to glance at Cas, and he wiggled his eyebrows suggestively.

"That's more like the Dean I know, " Cas panted.  "Sure you've never done this before?"

Dean laughed, the vibration in his mouth hummed against Cas's dick and it was just the push he needed.  "Sooo  good, Dean.  Mmmm.  Yeah.  Just like that..."

Cas gripped Dean by the hair as his climax rocketed through him.  "Ohhh. Dean! Yes!  Yeah! Deeeaan!"

Dean pulled back and quickly finished him off with his hand, and when he was done, he stared, somewhat dazed for a minute at Cas's panting form in front of him.

Cas grinned as their eyes met.  "Come here."

Dean crawled up next to him and curled into his shoulder.

"So are you traumatized? " Cas teased.

Dean laughed.  "Shut up."

Cas pulled him in closer and gave his forehead a little kiss.  "You,  Dean Winchester,  have a praise kink," he smirked.

"What?  I do not!"

Cas smiled fondly.   "You do... It's adorable, because you usually don't take complements.  But when you actually let your guard down, you like to be fawned over..."

Dean's face immediately turned red as he glanced away.  "No I don't!"

Cas chuckled.  "When did you become so shy?   And when are you going to let me Dom for you, Dean?" Cas rasped in his gravelly voice.  "You're so good for me.  Let me take care of you.  Let me control you; let me worship you..." 

Dean shot him an embarrassed glance, yet he couldn't stop smiling.  "Someday."

Cas grinned.  "Alright.  Since that little discussion got you all turned on," he hinted to Dean's shorts, "Why don't you take those off and I'll fix that little problem..."  
  
Dean nodded breathlessly and he let Cas slowly undress him.    
  
"Do you have any idea how beautiful you are, Dean?" Cas whispered as he smoothed his hands up and down Dean's naked body.

Dean glanced down at himself and scowled as he noticed the bruised and scarred skin that was indicative of his line of work. "I'm not..."

Cas quickly pressed a finger to his lips. "You are. Inside and out." He continued to let his hands wander as Dean let out a happy whimper.  Cas could feel his body relaxing immediately.  
  
"Praise kink," Cas taunted.    
  
Dean covered his face with a hand in embarrassment, but he couldn't help laughing a little.  "Cas... shut up and blow me."   
  
Cas smirked.  "With pleasure..."


	5. Chapter 5

It was bound to happen. Dean was a horrible liar, and unfortunately, he had to admit that even with his cold feet he was far too often thinking with his dick.

They were on a job in St. Paul, Minnesota, just back from tracking a wraith. Cas had joined them once again, which seemed a little odd to Sam since he wasn't really needed on this job, but a little extra backup was never a bad thing.

It was late when they arrived back at the motel for the night. Sam had killed the wraith with a silver blade to the heart this evening, and he immediately rushed to shower off the blood, leaving Dean and Cas alone for a few minutes.

Almost immediately Cas threw Dean down on the shabby motel mattress and pounced on him, eagerly sucking and kissing his neck.

"Holy shit, Cas," Dean gasped.

"Been wanting to do this all day," Cas whispered.

Dean could still hear the shower running, so he figured they had a few minutes. He grinned and coaxed Cas's lips toward his. "You're... gonna get us... in trouble, " he managed in between kisses.

"He's not going to catch us," Cas laughed. "Relax." He gave Dean a final kiss before rolling off of him. "Keeping my hands off of you while we're in bed together will be much more difficult however, " he teased.

"Well you'd better behave yourself," Dean warned.

Cas grinned. "You'd better pick a safeword then, because I am _so_ not behaving."

"Cas..." Dean could feel his face reddening.

"In fact," he said, gently nibbling at Dean's earlobe, "I'm going make you come tonight, so I hope you can be quiet."

Dean gasped out loud. "Dude! Not in front of Sam!"

Cas laughed. "It's not like I'm going to fuck you in front of him. Once he's asleep though, I'm going to get you off. Whether or not he finds out depends on how quiet you can be..."

Dean was already panting with a mixture of fear and excitement. Why the hell did this make him so damn horny? He'd never exactly considered himself an exhibitionist. Still, the worry about getting caught was strangely exciting. Maybe it was that element of control Cas would have over him.  Or maybe he was just kinkier than he thought he was.

Cas had shoved him back down for another kiss, but he practically vaulted off of him when the bathroom door suddenly opened.

Sam stepped out, looking at Dean suspiciously. While Cas was looking perfectly normal sitting on the edge of the bed, Dean was lying there looking sweaty and disheveled, his knees drawn up to hide his erection.

"Why are you out of breath?" Sam asked.

"I uh, went for a run."  Cas had to turn away.  He was afraid if he looked at Dean he'd burst out laughing.

Sam frowned.  "Since when do _you_ run?"  
  
"I ran to the corner store to see if they had beer, but, they don't so..."  
  
Sam stared at him like he was insane for a second, but he shrugged and crawled into his bed.   
  
Cas casually stood and began getting ready for bed, stripping down to his plain white boxer shorts.  Dean swallowed hard.  Normally they both left  a t-shirt on to sleep, and he was blushing just looking at Cas's naked chest.  Usually he wouldn't have thought twice about it because it was really no big deal, but he was suddenly sure Sam would see right through them.  
  
Cas smirked and raised an eyebrow playfully as he crawled into bed and Dean immediately jumped up and shut off the light.  He kicked off his jeans in the dark, hoping that his raging erection went unnoticed.   As he slid under the blankets, Cas's hand immediately slipped to his groin.  
  
Dean drew a sharp breath and bit down hard on his lip as he elbowed Cas in the ribs.  He _had_ promised to wait until Sam fell asleep, after all.  He felt Cas silently chuckle as he let go and rolled over onto his side, waiting patiently for Sam to fall asleep.   
  
Thankfully, Sam was an easy sleeper.  He generally fell asleep the minute his head hit the pillow, and tonight was no exception.  Within minutes, he was snoring away peacefully.   
  
Cas turned back to Dean and inched in close to his ear. "Now Dean, you're going to come for me," he barely whispered, "but I need you to be quiet.  Can you do that for me?"  
  
"I... don't know..." Dean whispered truthfully.   
  
Cas grinned.  "Well your options are, 'be quiet' or 'let Sam see us'.  Your call."  
  
Dean was already bucking his hips for no good reason and he let his hand slide down to his shorts.   Quickly, Cas smacked his hand away.  
  
"Only I get to touch you tonight," Cas whispered.  He climbed on top of him and straddled his waist.    
  
Dean was squinting up at Cas's shadowy form above him.  He wondered if Cas could see the stupefied look on his face right now.  He was still paranoid about Sam seeing them, and he was terrified that he might not be able to keep quiet.  And yet, he was _horny as fuck_.   
  
Cas began rutting against him, covering Dean's mouth with his own as he tongue-fucked him hard and dirty. Dean dug his fingertips into Cas's shoulders as he felt a moan rising up in his throat.   
  
"Shh," Cas whispered in his ear again.  "Come on, Dean.  Can you be a good boy for me?"  
  
Dean closed his eyes and nodded.  He was breathing so heavily now he was afraid he might wake up Sam without even saying anything.   
  
"Good," Cas whispered before returning his attention to Dean's mouth again. "Do you know how badly I want you, Dean?" Cas breathed.  "How much I want you bent over my knee?  Do you know how often I've thought about you in your little collar, all pliant and obedient for me?  Do you know how badly I want to take you right here?"    
  
Dean was so aroused, he was absolutely trembling. The stimulation mixed with the thrill of not being able to make a sound was overwhelming.  He was embarrassingly close already and it had only been a few minutes.    
  
"Cas..." he whispered.   
  
"What's wrong, Dean?" Cas taunted.   
  
"Cas, I'm gonna..." Dean bit down hard on his bottom lip as he whimpered softly.   
  
Cas increased the friction between them. "You gonna come?"  
  
Dean nodded frantically.  He was breathing so hard now he felt like he was having palpitations.    
  
"That's my good boy," Cas whispered.  "Come for me, Dean.  But you'd better be quiet..."  
  
Dean turned his head and bit down on the pillow as he arched his back.  His entire body began to spasm as he let out the tiniest squeaking sounds, and Cas quickly grabbed his jaw and crushed their mouths together again.  Dean came harder than he ever had in his life, and when he finally went slack on the bed, Cas rolled off and began caressing every square inch of him.    
  
He softly nuzzled against Dean's cheek.  "That was _amazing_ ," Cas whispered.  "I can't believe you stayed quiet!"   He peppered his face with tiny kisses.  "That's my boy.   _Such_ a good boy for me, Dean," he whispered, pushing his damp hair away from his face.   
  
Dean just lay there panting, completely unable to move.  He was exhausted - mentally, physically, and emotionally - but he managed a weak smile as he pulled Cas closer to him.   "You're terrible," he grinned.    
  
Cas smiled.  "You loved it."  He pressed two fingers to Dean's forehead, leaving him clean and dry again.  
  
They lay there for a few minutes as Dean struggled to catch his breath, wrapped in each other's arms.  A comfortable silence had set in between them, so when they heard the next noise they both nearly jumped out of their skin.   
  
"What the _fuck_ was that?"


	6. Chapter 6

Sam was usually a pretty sound sleeper.  After practically wrestling a wraith tonight, he was exhausted, and after a mostly-cold shower, even the shoddy motel mattress was a comfort.  He had just fallen asleep when his right calf muscle started cramping up, causing him to stir.   _Dammit, he really needed to readjust his running routine.  They were so busy lately, eating on the road, and he was probably not getting enough..._

Wait, what the hell was that?  For a minute, Sam almost disregarded the rustling noise and the soft panting coming from the bed next to his.  He and Dean had grown up sharing tiny motel rooms with virtually no 'alone time' for years, so he was accustomed to occasionally hearing a little more than he wanted to at night.  Sam was guilty of the same sometimes, so he really couldn't complain.  It was like there was an unspoken rule between them - just put your pillow over your head and ignore it.  After all, even hunters have needs.

So at first, in his sleepy state, he didn't think twice about it... until he suddenly remembered that Cas was there tonight. And when he heard the faint whisper coming from Cas, his face recoiled in horror.

_"Do you know how badly I want you, Dean?  How much I want you bent over my knee?  Do you know how often I've thought about you in your little collar, all pliant and obedient for me?  Do you know how badly I want to take you right here?"_

Oh _hell_ no. It was bad enough they were fooling around in a bed just three feet away from his, but he did _not_ need to hear about his brother in a collar and... ugh, bent over Cas's knee.  He shuddered silently.   Jesus, he'd expected that the two of them would eventually hook up with the way they acted around each other, but couldn't they have the common courtesy to wait until they were back in the bunker?   In their own separate room?

And now the dilemma of 'what to do' was racing through his mind.   He wasn't really sure what the etiquette was for this situation.  He felt like he should probably speak up, yell out 'Hey, you assholes!  I'm awake!', but at the same time, that was horribly embarrassing.

Some more unintelligible whispering was going on, and then he suddenly heard Cas.

_"That's my good boy.  Come for me, Dean.  But you'd better be quiet..."_

No, no, no, no, no!  Oh god, this could _not_ be happening!  Sam squeezed his eyes shut and tried to think about _anything_ other than Cas and Dean doing... whatever the hell they were doing.  To Dean's credit, he did manage to be fairly quiet, but the damage was already done. Sam would never be able to shake the thought of Cas screwing his brother. _Gross.  Holy shit, how long had they been... and since when was Dean all submissive and shit?  And why was he even thinking about this?  Eww!_

He sighed quietly as the two of them made contented little post-coital cooing noises, and suddenly Sam couldn't keep quiet anymore.  

"What the _fuck_ was that?" he blurted.

He heard Dean yelp as he quickly scramble to grab the blankets and cover himself.  "Nothing!  What..." he paused.  "Fuck!"

Cas firmly placed a hand on his chest to calm him.  "Shhh, Dean, relax."

Dean was thrashing like a frightened animal.  "Let go of me, Cas!" he yelled. Cas sighed and let go as Dean jumped out of bed and threw his jeans back on.

"Dean..." Sam started as he watched his brother in panic mode as he stormed to the door.

As the door slammed, Sam sighed heavily.  "Shit, I didn't mean to..."

"It's okay, Sam," Cas said softly, jumping to his feet and bolting after Dean, not even bothering to put his clothes back on.

Dean had his hand on the door handle of the Impala when Cas grabbed him by the front of his shirt and shoved him up against the car.

"Dean, listen..."

"I just need a minute!  Let me go, Cas!" Dean snapped.

"Dean," Cas said firmly, using his body to immobilize him against the car.  "Calm down."

"Fuck off, Cas!" Dean screamed angrily.

Cas forcefully grabbed his chin and turned it toward him.  "Look at me," he demanded.  Dean was panting so hard he was nearly hyperventilating, and Cas quickly softened his tone. "Take a deep breath," he said quietly.

Dean suddenly slumped forward onto Cas's shoulder as he lost what little resolve he had left. "Shit. Fuck. Cas, I can't... Fuck!" he babbled, seemingly unable to form a sentence.

"I know, " Cas soothed, stroking his hair. "I'm so sorry, Dean. I didn't expect that to happen. Sam is usually such a heavy sleeper."

"This is not how I wanted to come out to Sammy," he wheezed. "Fuck, I didn't want to have to tell him at all! Why do you think I've spent so many years denying this part of me? I don't know what he's going to think, and I don't know if I can..."

"Dean," Cas said calmly. "Breathe. You're going to pass out if you keep hyperventilating."

"Cas, I..."

"Dean, just stop for a minute. Breathe in..." he rubbed little circles against Dean's back as he spoke. " Good. Breathe out... good. In..."

Dean closed his eyes and held on to Cas's waist as he took a few deep breaths.

"I'm sorry, Dean. I shouldn't have done that with Sam in the room. But he's not going to think any less of you for... _having relations with_ a male," Cas whispered.

"How much of that do you think he heard? " Dean asked weakly.

"I don't know, " Cas admitted.

"Do you think he heard the whole bit about the collar and stuff?"

Cas smiled a little. "If he did, he's not going to care about that either, Dean. Come back inside," he said, nuzzling against his ear. "We'll tell him together."

"I don't think I can, " Dean sighed.

"Of course you can. Be brave for me," Cas whispered.

Dean took a long, deep breath and nodded.

"That's my boy," Cas said, slipping his arm around Dean's waist and leading him back to the motel room.

Sam was sitting up on his bed when they walked in and immediately he began apologizing. "Dean, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to yell like that. It just... surprised me?" he said uncertainly.

Dean was staring awkwardly at the floor as Cas led him back to his bed.

"I'm sorry, Sam. This was completely my fault. I should not have tried to seduce Dean while you were in the room," Cas said matter-of-factly.

"Hell no you shouldn't have! " Sam snapped. He quickly tried to calm himself as he saw the anxious look on Dean's face.  "So have you been... seducing my brother for long?" he fumbled.  
  
"For a few weeks."  
  
Sam nodded uncertainly.  "Oookay.  Soooo... I don't care what the hell you two do, but if you do it again while I'm in the room, I will end you both."  
  
"Sam, I... we're not..." Dean croaked, struggling to find his voice.  
  
"Dean, you don't need to explain.  Frankly, I'm surprised this didn't happen ages ago.    Aside from being a little hurt that you didn't think you could _tell_ me, I'm fine with it. In fact, I'm actually happy for you two.  I just don't want to be in the room when it's going on."  
  
"S...sorry, Sammy," Dean mumbled sheepishly.  
  
Sam yawned and climbed back under his blankets.  "Forget it.  Just go to sleep."  
  
Cas stood up and turned the light off, and then crawled into bed next to Dean. "Come here," he whispered, pulling Dean's still-trembling body close to his chest.   As Sam quickly nodded off again, he whispered comforting little things in Dean's ear.    
  
"It's okay, Dean.  Everything is going to be fine. I know that was difficult, but you did good tonight..."  
  
Dean didn't respond.  His posture was stiff and tense as Cas rubbed his back.  
  
Cas frowned.  "Hey."  
  
"Hmm?"  
  
"It's all going to be fine."  
  
"Yeah," Dean said listlessly.  
  
Cas sighed, silently chastising himself for being so overly eager.  He just hoped this didn't ruin all the progress they had made.  


	7. Chapter 7

When Cas showed up in the bunker the next evening, Dean was a nervous wreck.  It wasn't that he didn't still want everything that he and Cas had shared recently, but up until now it was a dirty little secret; a fantasy that he was content to keep to himself.  Now that Sammy knew, it was... _real_.

He'd expected to get more shit from Sam about it.  Frankly, he'd had no idea how Sam would react to the fact that he might be into guys.  That had worried him since long before Cas, so when Sam was fairly nonchalant about it, it was sort of anti-climactic.  Even the fact that the guy _was_ Cas didn't really seem to phase him.

The long ride home from St. Paul was quiet this afternoon.  Sam didn't say a word, and the fact that he was being so cool about this was actually driving Dean crazy.  After all, this had been a long, stressful journey for him - a journey that wasn't yet complete.  He almost wanted Sam to shake him, yell 'what the fuck is wrong with you', something!   _Anything_ was better than his silent acceptance on the matter.

During a particularly long, quiet stretch of road, Dean even tried to talk about it.   "Sam, about last night..."

"Dude, I don't care," Sam interrupted.  "Whatever you and Cas do is your own business. Just don't do it near me."

"But Sammy, I'm not..."

"You're not what, Dean?"  Sam laughed.  "If you were about to say 'I'm not gay', just pull over right now so I can punch you in your damn face."

Dean clenched his jaw and stared at the road. His nostrils flared as he tried to hold back whatever-the-hell emotion he was feeling right now.

"I'm not."

Sam rolled his eyes.  "You're right.  You're not gay.  You're bisexual. And that's cool, Dean. It's nothing to be ashamed of. I've suspected for a long time."

"What the fuck are you talking about?"  Dean yelled.

"Well, let's see.  Nick the siren?  Oh, that time you were drunk-flirting with that police officer..."  he paused.  "Actually, you flirt with guys a _lot_ when you're drunk.  And your little obsession with Dr. Sexy.  And..."

"Alright, alright!" Dean muttered in exasperation.  "But... it was just a little fooling around.  We haven't done...  _that_ ," he said weakly.

Sam took a minute to regroup.   _Was Dean actually trying to talk about his feelings?  Because this was weird.  Alright, maybe he needed to give him the 'you're my brother and I love you no matter what' talk._

"Well.   Maybe you should."

"Dude!" Dean yelled, nearly driving off the road.

Sam sighed softly.  "Look, Dean.  It's obvious you guys are into each other.  I knew it would eventually happen.  I'm sorry you're having a hard time, but at the same time, I'm glad you're finally getting brave enough to do something about it."

"What do you mean you _knew_?"

"No offense, but you guys aren't exactly subtle.  The little touches, the eye-sexing, the... 'profound bond' Cas talks about, the way you stare at his ass," he laughed.  "And you flirt with him so damn hard sometimes..."

"I do not!"

"You do.  And it's hilarious, because you know how Cas is.  He doesn't always catch on..."

Dean huffed indignantly. "Fuck."

"It's alright, man.  Seriously.  I just want you to be happy." Sam said, giving him a firm pat on his shoulder. "Now go get some weird kinky angel-sex."

Dean's could feel his face burning immediately. Goddammit, _of course_ Sam had heard Cas's little dirty talk.  He suddenly felt a little nauseated.  He didn't want Sammy knowing he was into kinky shit and he sure as hell didn't want him to think he was the... well, the  _collared_ one.  The rest of the ride home was silent as Sam napped and Dean let his insides eat him alive with embarrassment.

That evening, Cas showed up as they were eating dinner, rather than appearing in Dean's bedroom as usual.  Dean had just taken a huge bite of his pizza and he nearly choked when Cas suddenly materialized next to him at the table.

"Cas!" Dean gagged in between his coughing fit.  "What... what are you doing here?"

Cas frowned.  "I'm here all the time," he said confusedly.  "Oh!  You mean, why am I not in your bedroom?"

Sam burst out laughing and Dean's face flamed bright red.

"I thought perhaps we didn't have to sneak around anymore now that Sam is aware of our relationship... Errr.  Friendship?  Our um..." Cas suddenly flustered as he tried to come up with a word that wouldn't scare Dean off.

Dean's eyes were already wide and panicked as he stared down at his dinner, completely unsure of how to act now that everything was out in the open.

Cas sighed and stood.  "Come to the living room when you're finished," he said gently.

Dean didn't acknowledge him, still staring down at his plate.

"Dean?" Sam asked.

Dean looked up, and Sammy was giving him those goddamn puppy eyes that made him want to hide out in his bedroom for the rest of the night.

"Just go talk to him," Sam urged.

Dean took a deep breath and stood, grudgingly making his way to the living room.

Cas was sitting on the vintage old couch and immediately he greeted Dean with a command.  "Sit."

Dean walked to the chair across from him and took a seat, and Cas rolled his eyes.

"What is your _problem_?" Cas snapped.  "I know this is hard for you, Dean, but right now you're acting like a child!"  Cas knew that snapping at Dean was the surest fire way to piss him off, but frankly, he was a little pissed off himself.

Sure enough, Dean gritted his teeth and spat back at him.  "Well maybe its because I think this whole damn thing was a mistake!"

Cas narrowed his eyes and shot him a vehement glare.  "You don't mean that."

"Maybe I do, Cas!"

Cas was across the room and on him before Dean could even blink.  "Listen to me, you coward!" he snarled, gripping a handful of Dean's t-shirt in his fist.  "We can end this, but we both know that's not what you want."  Cas was straddling Dean's hips as he leaned into him, angrily shoving him back against the chair.  "You finally admitted it to yourself, you finally allowed yourself to be happy, and now just because Sam knows you're going to throw it all away?"

Dean's eyes were wide and watery as he looked up at Cas, and his chest was heaving in a mixture of fear and anger.  He glanced away immediately.

"Look me in the eyes and tell me you don't want me, Dean! _Tell me_ and I'll leave you alone."

Dean bit down hard on his lip that was now quivering as a rogue tear threatened to roll down his cheek.  "Cas..."

"Tell me!" Cas demanded.

Try as he might, that damn tear slipped out anyway, followed by a few more.

Cas sighed sadly.  Ever-so-gently he raised Dean's chin until their eyes met, tilting his head in a quizzical way.

Cas was close enough that Dean could feel his warm breath against his lips, and before he knew what was happening, he had tentatively leaned forward and nuzzled at Cas's jaw.

Instead of jumping in like he wanted to, Cas sat still for a moment as Dean began to press tiny kisses to his lips and chin.

"I'm sorry," Dean whispered, wrapping his arms around his his waist. "I'm sorry, Cas.  Please..."

Cas shoved him back against the chair and tugged at Dean's bottom lip with his teeth.  Dean groaned and shoved forward, kissing him hard and urging Cas's mouth open with his tongue.

"Dean..." Cas mumbled in between kisses.  "I need you to be okay with this."

Dean pulled back for a second.  "What?  The kissing?  Of course I am..."

" _No_ , Dean.  I need you to be okay with _all_ of this.  You can't freak out like that every time someone finds out about us."  He backed off of the chair and took Dean's hand, guiding him back over to the couch.

"I know, it was stupid.  I'm sorry.  I think I'm done freaking out...  Fuck, Cas.  I want you and..."

"Lie down," Cas interrupted.

Dean frowned in confusion, but he did as he was told, gently resting his head on Cas's lap.   "Dean..."  Cas began rhythmically stroking his hair, running his fingers through the short strands.  "I also need you to stop holding back when we're together," he suddenly blurted.

Dean glanced away guiltily and his face reddened. "I'm gonna try."

"I don't mean  _that_. I mean I need you to be honest with me. And with yourself.  I know you have this fear of getting too close to people, but I _need_ you, Dean. All of you."

Dean nodded as he drew in a shaky, deep breath.

"I need you to trust me, " Cas continued. "Can you try something for me?"

"What? " Dean asked.

"I want to give you a safeword. I'm not going to do anything sexual tonight but I want you to try a few things that scare you."

Dean frowned. "Like what? "

"Nothing weird, " Cas promised. "This is about trust, Dean. Obey me tonight and show me you can handle this."

Dean's heart was racing in his chest. _What the hell did Cas want him to do?_

"Can you do that for me, Dean? "

Dean nodded, still unsure of what he was getting himself into. All he knew was that he wanted to be with Cas, and if this would win his trust back, he'd do it.

"I will never make you do anything you really don't want to do," Cas said sincerely. "But I also want you to work on being less anxious when showing affection. So choose a safeword, and if something is too difficult for you, you use it, understand? "

Dean nodded. "Impala," he said firmly.

"Impala, " Cas confirmed.

Just then, Sam walked into the room, causing them both to startle. "Oh!  Sorry!  It got quiet. I thought you guys had left..."

Dean immediately struggled to sit up as soon as Sam entered.

"Dean," Cas placed a hand on his chest and looked at him pointedly. "Stay," he mouthed.  Dean lay back down, feeling strangely aroused with Cas ordering him around.

"Sorry, I'll watch TV upstairs," Sam said quickly.

"No," Cas insisted.  "It's okay.  We can watch here.  Turn it on."

"You sure?"

Cas nodded.  Dean nodded too, blushing a little as Cas continued to stroke his hair.

Sam quirked an eyebrow in amusement. "Okay then."  He settled down in the chair across from them and turned on _Jeopardy!_

"You're such a nerd," Dean groaned.  Sam just smirked.

Dean had never shown romantic affection towards anyone while Sam was around, and just lying here with Cas felt profoundly intimate.  He felt vulnerable, and vulnerable was a feeling Dean didn't do well.     
  
He focused on Cas's face to distract himself from the fact that Sammy was sitting just a few feet away. Cas's hand slipped from his hair, down to his neck, and then paused at his chest, rubbing little circles against the fabric of his t-shirt. Dean took a second to glance over at Sam, who was thoroughly engrossed in his TV show, and he gasped as a hand gently made it's way underneath the hem of his shirt.  He turned back to Cas, wide-eyed as his breathing began to grow ragged. He was both terrified and incredibly turned on right now. _Dammit, he really needed to reevaluate these exhibitionist tendencies._

"Good boy," Cas silently mouthed, making Dean bite back a sheepish grin.

Dean closed his eyes and let out a happy little hum as Cas caressed his stomach and chest. He lay there a long time until his neck started to cramp, and when he sat up, Cas immediately moved in closer and put an arm around him, coaxing him to slouch into his shoulder. Dean's posture stiffened at first, but he closed his eyes again and tried to get comfortable as Cas nuzzled at his hair.

"You okay?" Cas whispered faintly against his ear.

Dean nodded, eyes still closed somewhat nervously and he whimpered out loud as Cas nibbled at his earlobe and kissed his cheek.

Sam was watching this scene out of the corner of his eye, completely amused at his brother's commitment-phobia.  Regardless of Dean's obvious discomfort of being in the same room, Cas seemed to have some sort of hold on him.  It was impressive.  His emotionally-stunted brother could really be a stubborn bastard when it came to 'feelings'.    
  
"Dean," Cas whispered as quietly as he could manage. "Kiss me."  
  
Dean's breath and pulse quickened as he thought about kissing Cas with Sam in the room.   _Why the hell was this so difficult for him?_   Cas was looking at him expectantly.    
  
"What kind of car do you drive again, Dean?" Cas asked quietly, shooting him a knowing look.   
  
Dean shook his head. _No.  He wasn't going to chicken out again.  He could do this._   _Dammit, he wanted this just as much as Cas did._  He squared his shoulders determinedly and lunged forward, catching Cas off-guard.   
  
"Dean!" Cas exclaimed, laughing as he leaned back on the couch, pulling Dean down on top of him.    
  
"Whoa!" Sam suddenly exclaimed.  "Hey, still in the room here!  Again.  Take it upstairs or something!"  
  
Cas giggled and wrapped his arms around him as Dean's tongue plundered his mouth.  "Good boy," he purred, and Dean growled, rolling his hips against him as the kissing became more frantic.   
  
"Seriously, guys!  What the fuck!" Sam yelled, covering his eyes with his hand in annoyance.    
  
Cas was the one to finally break up their little heavy petting session.  "I'm sorry, Sam," he said, struggling to sit up and gently push Dean off of him.   
  
"Dean.  Come upstairs."  


	8. Chapter 8

They had barely made it to Dean's bedroom before Cas had him shoved up against the open door.

"You gonna be good for me, Dean?"  Cas growled against his ear, just before crushing their mouths together in a bruising kiss. "Are we done with all the macho bullshit now?"

Dean nodded breathlessly, and Cas yanked him inside, slamming the door behind them.

"Clothes off.  Now," Cas demanded.

With shaky hands, Dean quickly undressed.

"Beautiful," Cas breathed.  "You remember your safeword? " he asked as he pushed him down onto the bed.

Dean nodded. "Impala, " he stated.

"Good." Cas grinned and crawled on top of him, settling between Dean's legs. He pinned his arms over his head and slowly rolled his hips.

"Shit, Cas, " Dean rasped. "You don't fuck around when you want something."

"Unlike some people," Cas deadpanned in his signature grumbly voice.  "I should spank you for all that you've put me through," he growled, firmly wrapping a hand around Dean's throbbing erection.

"I... I deserve that," Dean panted excitedly.  Something about seeing Cas acting all dominant and controlling was a major turn-on. He thought about the first night he'd met Castiel in the barn and he groaned, suddenly remembering just how powerful Cas was.

Cas began to softly kiss at his neck. "Where's your collar, sweetheart? "

"Drawer, " Dean gasped, pointing to the nightstand beside the bed. He shivered at the unlikely little term of endearment.

Cas retrieved it quickly and Dean sat up, eyes wide as the collar tightened around his neck.

"Good boy, " Castiel soothed. " _You_ are _mine_ now, " he said. "No more games, Dean.  Promise me."

"Y...yeah, Cas," Dean stuttered.  "Promise."

" _Sir_.  Right now you call me _sir_ ," Cas commanded.

"Y...yes sir."

Castiel was feeling alive for the first time in years, and maybe even a little drunk on power.  It wasn't _just_ the power of course.  He _loved_ Dean.  And of course, they would talk about this later.  But for now, they both needed something more than talking.

"Now tell me what you like, " Cas whispered as he gently tugged at Dean's earlobe with his teeth.

"Being controlled," Dean panted, somewhat in disbelief that this was coming out of his mouth. "Tied up. Handcuffs. Blindfold. Gag. Collar. Leash.  Spanking if I'm bad... fucking if I'm good... .." he rambled, his arousal finally overriding his anxiousness.

"Good... I will be taking care of your sexual needs from now on," Cas continued. "So you will not touch yourself without my permission."  His hand wrapped around him again and he slowly began stroking.

Dean moaned in response. "Yes, sir."

Cas kissed him as he built up speed, making Dean twitch and moan on the bed, and when his hand suddenly pulled away, Dean whined loudly.

Cas just laughed.  "Not yet," he said, "We have so much more to do first... Do you have rope, Dean?"

Dean nodded.  "In the bag under the bed."

Cas stood and rooted around in the weapons bag until he found a short length of rope.  "Bend over. Hands on the headboard," he demanded.

Dean whimpered in anticipation as he bent forward and gripped the cold metal.  He was horny as hell now and he wished Cas would take his fucking clothes off already. He felt weird being the only one naked, and at the same time, it turned him on even more.

Cas lashed the scratchy rope around his wrists and secured them to the headboard.

"P...please, sir," Dean was panting heavily now.  He needed _something_.  Anything.  He was going to come just waiting for something to happen.

Cas smiled.  "Oh Dean.  There's still the matter of your punishment. And now that you're in position..."  He smoothed a hand down Dean's spine, stroking him like a cat.  "You've been a bad boy recently and I think we need to address that..."

Dean nodded reluctantly, and Cas's hand cracked down hard on his ass. Dean winced as he cried out. _Holy shit, Cas wasn't taking it easy on him either._

Another slap came down on him and he gritted his teeth and yanked against his restraints.

Quickly, Cas swooped in, gently soothing his hand over the area.  He bent and kissed the warm red handprint as Dean whimpered.   "I think that's enough," Cas said softly.  He ran his hands up and down Dean's naked form as he praised him again.

"You took your punishment so well," Cas said softly.   "But I also think you deserve a little reward for loosening up downstairs..."  He dug through the bedside table drawer and located a bottle of lube.

Dean was nearly crawling out of his skin waiting for Cas to touch him.

"Tell me your safeword, " Cas demanded again.

"Impala. "

"Good. Now Dean, I am going to fuck you," Cas said firmly.  "You are going to submit to me completely, and it's going to be way better than any damn toy."

"Yes. Please," Dean begged. His whole body was hot and achy with need, and he was beginning to feel a little lightheaded.

Cas licked his lips slowly and backed up off of the bed. He stroked down Dean's spine a few more times as Dean wantonly arched into his touch.

"I like seeing you beg," Cas mused. "So vulnerable and open. Just waiting for me to take you..."

Dean moaned deep and low as he watched Cas slip out of his shirt and pants.  "Hurry," he rasped.

Cas leered at him suggestively as he slowly let his plain white boxer shorts drop to the ground, and Dean's panting became heavier.  He clipped a leash to Dean's collar and tugged it playfully before looping it around his wrist, and then knelt on the bed behind him.

Dean arched his ass back toward him and Cas laughed.  "Eager, are we?"  He caressed his cheeks gently before gripping and spreading them with his thumbs.  One finger stroked against the puckered flesh and he felt a quick shot of warmth against his skin, and then suddenly, Cas's mouth was there.

"Holy shit!" Dean gasped and whimpered at the same time. He had been with a lot of women in his life, but none of them had ever even attempted to lick him _there_.  If he thought about it too long, he'd probably find it a little weird, but it felt amazing, so he gave himself over to the feeling as Cas began prodding at him with his tongue.

Dean was already mewling frantically as Cas traced circles around the hole, letting his tongue dip into him occasionally.

"Cas... I need..."

"Sir," Cas admonished him, suddenly backing up and giving him a slap.

Dean jerked excitedly.  " _Sir_ ," he corrected, "I'm not going to last if you don't.. _do_ something."  It was true.  He didn't think he could _really_ come untouched, but he sure as hell felt like he might.

Cas bit back a grin.  "Okay, Dean."

Dean felt a cold glob of lube between his cheeks and before he even had time to process, Cas had slid a finger inside of him. He cried out loudly and jerked forward.

"Shhh," Cas hushed him, using his free hand to stroke his back again.  "Good boy."  He wiggled his finger a little and slid in and out a few times to let Dean get used to it.  "Sam is probably in his bedroom by now.  Can you be quiet or do I have to gag you?"

"Gag," Dean whispered, his hips already humping the air he was so excited.

Cas grinned. "You _are_ a kinky one, aren't you?" Cas picked his tie up off the floor and meticulously rolled it. "Open," he commanded. Dean obediently opened his mouth and Cas stuffed the tie in. "Now that you can't speak, I want you to make a peace sign with your fingers if you need to safeword, understood? "

Dean nodded, and a second later, he felt Cas behind him.

"Fuck," he yelled into the gag as Cas began push into him.  Cas was wider than his toy and he was glad he had the gag to keep him from yelling out loud.

Cas inched inside him slowly, letting Dean adjust every few seconds. As he bottomed out against him, Dean groaned into his gag again.

"Such a good boy, Dean. Tied up and moaning all pretty for me... taking it up the ass like you were meant to..." Cas purred.  He leaned forward and nuzzled the base of his neck.

Dean's eyes were watering as he bit down hard on Cas's tie. God, it hurt and felt good at the same time, and Cas's dirty talk was awakening his submissive nature. Right now all he wanted was for Cas to fuck him hard as he sat there and took it.

Cas slowly began moving his hips as Dean bucked and moaned beneath him. " That's it," Cas whispered. "You feel amazing, Dean. So hot and tight..." Cas fought back a groan as his fingertips dug into Dean's hips, arching his back up so that he could get a better angle. "How's this feel?"  He pistoned his hips firmly for a few minutes, delighting in the absolutely debauched noises Dean was making through his gag. 

Dean whimpered and nodded frantically.  He  was feeling emotional now, and the tears were flowing in a weird sort of catharsis. His arms were already tingly and numb from being tied above his head, and he was practically drooling through his gag.   Cas was speeding up, rubbing against his prostate just right and Dean was already close.  He wanted to cry out, needed to say something to Cas, but the gag was preventing him.  He started trying to work the tie out of his mouth with his tongue.

Cas was panting, thrusting into him harder now, but he noticed Dean struggling against the gag.  He paused for just a second as he removed it from his mouth.

"You okay?" he panted.

Dean nodded.  "Cas... touch me.   _Please_ ," he gasped.

"Shit," Cas mumbled.  "Sorry."  He quickly spat in his hand and reached around to start stroking him in time with his thrusting.

Dean moaned in ecstasy as the warm tingling in his abdomen spread throughout his body. He whimpered again as his knees gave under him, but Cas just gripped him tighter as he pounded into him.

"Cas," Dean managed weakly.  "Oh fuck..."

Without warning, Cas suddenly dug a hand into the thick of his hair and tugged his head back.

"Who do you belong to, Dean?"

"You," he wheezed.

"Tell me, Dean.  Say my name.  My _full_ name.  Who do you belong to?" Cas growled, stroking him even faster.

"Fuck!  You!  I belong to _you_ , Castiel," Dean sobbed, totally overcome with emotion and physical sensation.

"That's right," Cas whispered, leaning forward to kiss and nip at his shoulder.  " _Mine_ , Dean."

"Fuck!   Ohhh fuck.  Shit!  Fuck!   Cas!"  He yelped as his orgasm overtook him, his whole body going limp as Cas finished him off with his hand.

Cas touched the ropes around his wrists and they suddenly disappeared, and he pulled Dean back onto his lap, still thrusting upward as his arms wrapped around him.  "Do you have any idea how much I love you, Dean?"  Cas murmured as he sucked gently at Dean's neck.  Dean knotted his fingers in Cas's hair, and turned his head, kissing him long and slow as Cas gripped him tighter.

"Dean... I'm going to..."

"Yeah," Dean breathed.  "Come, Castiel."

Cas moaned loudly as his hips began to stutter. "Ohhh.  Dean.  Yes!   Dean!"  The lights in the room started flickering, and he buried his face in Dean's shoulder as he rode out his climax.   
  
As they both sat there trying to catch their breath, Dean fell forward in exhaustion, groaning as Cas pulled out.  He immediately rolled onto his back and pulled Cas down on top of him, kissing frantically.  
  
"I love you too," he whispered. 


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I seem to have lost a subscriber and a few bookmarks after the last chapter... was it the rimming? It's always the rimming. Sorry, folks. I never know where the smut is going to take me until it happens! Ah well. The rest of you, thanks for hanging in there, you dirty ducks. ;)

'I love you' was a phrase Dean hadn't said often in his lifetime.  Frankly, he didn't usually stick around long enough to build up that sort of relationship, and the few times he did had ended badly.  He lay there panting a few minutes just gazing up at Cas, his legs and arms wrapped possessively around his body, amazed at how easily the words had fallen out of his mouth.

"You are _amazing_ ," Cas breathed, planting little kisses all along Dean's jawline.  "Your soul is beautiful, Dean. I can see it when we're close like this."

Dean was in a post-coital daze, still breathing heavily and unable to speak, so he simply nuzzled against Cas's cheek for a while until his breathing returned to normal. When Cas gently rolled off of him, he immediately snuggled in close, feeling helpless and a bit needy.  He didn't want to let go of him for even a second.

"So good, Dean, " Cas sighed happily. "Are you okay? "  He tightened his arm around his back and began caressing his hair.

Dean laughed. "I'm fine. "

"I didn't mean physically, " Cas said softly. " I know it was hard for you to get to this point... Though I admit, I'm not entirely sure why."

Dean sighed. "I don't know, Cas. A lot of reasons. All stupid ones, but still..."

Cas softly brushed his lips against his forehead. "Like what?"

Dean took a deep breath. "It's just stupid, really... Dad caught me with a guy one time. Think I was fifteen or sixteen, alone at some random motel. Sammy had broken his arm at school and dad had taken him to get a cast put on. One of the times he was surprisingly home," he rolled his eyes.  "Anyway, they were going to the hospital and he said they were stopping for ice cream on the way home. I figured they'd be a while and I invited a friend over to help me with some homework... Well, we didn't get much done.  One thing led to another and dad walked in while he was in the process of giving me a blow job. He freaked the _fuck_ out. Ranting and raving about how disgusting it was and how disappointed he was in me. Asked me straight up if I was gay. I had no idea at that point, but I swore to him I wasn't. He told me if he caught me with another guy,  he'd disown me.  And if that happened, God only knows where the hell he'd take off to, and he'd take Sam with him.   I couldn't lose Sammy, Cas.  Couldn't leave him alone.  So I just... didn't do it again.  And for whatever reason, I've spent the rest of my life trying to ignore that part of me."

Cas stared at him silently for a few moments. "I'm sorry, Dean.  But you know, that was a long time ago.  You're an adult now, and your dad isn't here..."

Dean shrugged.  "I know, I know!  It's stupid.  But it's like there's a mental block there.  It's been difficult,"  He paused.  "Not to mention, everyone I get close to dies. You know that as well as I do."

"Dean..."

"It's true, Cas! It's just easier on me if I try not to get too involved with anyone. Hence, the one-night stands and leaving before they even wake up in the morning, and..."

Cas shut him up with a long, passionate kiss. "I'm not going anywhere, Dean," he said as he pulled away.

"You don't know that, Cas!  Hell, we've both died before! God, how fucked up is it to be able to say that?"

"And I keep coming back, Dean.  And as long as I'm still around in some shape or form, I _will_ find you."

Dean sighed heavily.  "Well.  Regardless, it shouldn't matter. I'm done living my life worrying about what _might_ happen."

Cas nodded and pulled him in closer.  "Good.  And now that you're done worrying, you have lots more time for dirty, kinky sex." He tugged firmly at the leash that was still slung around his wrist.

Dean burst out laughing. "I don't even have a response for that..."  

"I took it easy on you today," Cas teased.  "It's going to get much, much filthier."

Dean grinned sheepishly.  "Hope so.  What the hell did you do to my ass, anyway?"

"Uh, Dean?" Cas frowned.  "I thought that was obvious."

"No!  Before you... uh...  licked me," he blushed.  "You touched me.  It was... I don't know.  Warm."

Cas laughed.  "Oh!  Right.  Um.  I've heard some men can be anxious about..."  he frowned, struggling for the right words.  " _Cleanliness_."

Dean covered his face with a hand in embarrassment.  "You're telling me I had a fucking angel colonic?"

Cas shrugged.  "Considering your anxiety about the situation, I thought it might be pertinent."

"Oh my god!" Dean laughed nervously.  "But yeah, I suppose that was a good idea. I uh... _was_ a little anxious about that.  Usually I would uh... _prepare_  beforehand."

"Just wanted to make it good for you," Cas said softly.

Dean nibbled gently at his earlobe. "Oh it was good.  It was _so_ good.  You're kind of a possessive bastard, you know," he mused.   
  
"Mmm, just in bed," Cas smiled.  "I think after waiting all this time I'm allowed to be.  Besides, you clearly love being owned."  He fisted the leash in his hand and tugged again, making Dean blush furiously.  "But I suppose we could take this off now, hmm?"  
  
"We could... but you might as well leave it on for round two."  
  
Cas grinned.  "You sure about that?  Pretty sure I owe you a spanking for slipping up and not calling me 'sir' at least once."  
  
"Yes, _sir_ ," Dean purred.   
  
Cas growled happily and flipped him onto his back.  "Good boy," he whispered. 


	10. Chapter 10

Sam threw some chia seeds into the blender with the rest of his concoction and hit the 'blend' button.  He was just back from his morning run, mopping his forehead with a towel as he waited for his smoothie to finish.

He was so tired this morning.  It was hard to sleep with his brother moaning in ecstasy from the next room over.  After a long earful of torture, he finally nodded off around 4 a.m., falling into a restless sleep. He was proud of Dean for finally working through this, but Jesus, he was going to lose his sanity if they kept this up.

He switched the blender off and reached for a glass, but startled as he caught Cas out of the corner of his eye.

"Shit, you scared me," Sam greeted him.

"I apologize," Cas said sincerely. " It appears Dean is going to sleep all day and I got bored waiting. Do you mind if I hang out down here a while? "

Sam shrugged. "Help yourself. Just having some breakfast. Can I get you some coffee or anything?"

"Coffee would be wonderful. Thank you. "

Sam poured both his smoothie and Cas's coffee and carted them out to the library. Cas followed and slumped down in the chair across from him.

Sam nodded and smiled awkwardly. While he considered Cas one of his few friends, he just wasn't close to him like Dean had always been. It was rare that they were ever in the same room without Dean, and now with the awkwardness of Cas fucking his brother, he wasn't sure what to say right now.  He cleared his throat tentatively.

"So um.  How's Dean?" he finally asked.

Cas smiled.  "He's fine. Exhausted, mostly.  I think he's not used to..."

"Whoa, whoa!  Yeah, I know.  I don't need details!"

"...showing so much emotion," Cas finished with a smile.

"Oh," Sam said, relieved.  "Sorry.  That's what I meant anyway.  I think I've just overheard a little too much in the last few days."

Cas blushed.  "He'll be fine.  I'll see if I can construct some sort of soundproof warding in Dean's room this evening."

Sam sighed, "That would be great."

"What are you guys talking about?" a voice suddenly called.

They both turned to see Dean heading down the stairs toward them.  He was hobbling, and trying valiantly to pretend that every muscle in his body wasn't aching.

"Hello, Dean," Cas said warmly, standing to greet him at the bottom of the staircase.  "How did you sleep?"  He wrapped his arms around him and went in for a kiss.

" _Cas_ ," Dean protested shyly, turning his head.  "Not in front of Sammy," he said softly.

Cas smirked.  "You didn't seem to have a problem attacking me in front of Sam last night..."

"Yeah, well I don't know what came over me..." Dean started, his face reddened.

Cas leaned in close to his ear. "Well I came _inside_ you..."  He pulled away and gave Dean a lecherous grin and a wink then turned back toward Sam as if nothing happened.

Dean's face was fire-engine red now and he hurried off to the kitchen for some coffee.

Sam shook his head confusedly. "I don't want to know what you just said to him, Cas, but I've never seen him blush like that.  It's like you have some weird hold on him."

"Is that bad?"

"No.  It's just... weird," Sam said.  He took a long sip of his smoothie and opened his laptop.  "So we don't have any jobs lined up.  What do you guys have planned for today?"

Cas shrugged.  "I don't know.  I thought we'd stay in," he said, trying hard to stifle a grin.

Sam covered his face in exasperation.

Just then, Dean came strolling back from the kitchen with a sheepish look on his face.  "So uh.  What are we doing today, Sammy?"

"Well.   _I_ will be here and at the library researching all day.   _You_ , I assume, will be in your bedroom with Cas."

"Oh shut up," Dean grumbled.

Cas smirked.  "Well, he's not wrong..."

" _Oh my god_ , can we just not talk about it?" Dean asked, striding quickly toward the living room.

Sam just laughed and shook his head.  "Looks like you still have your work cut out for you, Cas."

Cas just sighed and hurried after Dean.

"I'm tryin', Cas," Dean sighed as Cas flopped down next to him on the couch.

"I know," Cas said softly.  "Are you okay after last night?"

Dean sighed.  "Yeah.  I am.  Really. I guess I'm just not a PDA kind of person."  He stared down at his t-shirt, anxiously picking at a loose thread.

"That's okay.  It's just that now that I have you, I'm having a hard time keeping my hands off of you," Cas smiled.

"Well, you might have to for a day or two.  I'm sore as hell."

Cas bit back a grin and touched two fingers to Dean's forehead.  A tiny flash of light temporarily blinded him and suddenly all of the stiffness in his muscles eased.

"Ohhh fuck, that's good," Dean sighed, slumping over onto Cas's shoulder.

Cas turned toward him, pulling him toward his chest.  "I love you, you know," he said, gently stroking his hair.

Dean smiled a little, finally letting his guard down since Sam was no longer in the room.  "I know."

"You were really okay with me getting all toppy on you?" Cas asked.

"Mmmhmm, " Dean mumbled blissfully. "I would have said so if I weren't. "

Cas nodded silently. "I was thinking... and maybe it's too early to be asking this but... have you ever thought about taking it a little further? "

Dean's tired eyes suddenly flew open. "Uhh... I'm not really sure what that would entail, to be honest. I mean, I like a little spanking and restraints. And I just about jizzed my pants when you made me call you 'sir'. But uh... I guess I'm not sure what you mean. And how the hell do you even know about this stuff anyway? " 

Cas shrugged nonchalantly. "I've done a lot of research. The Dom/sub relationship very much appeals to me. And since you're the submissive type, I thought you may have considered it before. I mean, I'm just curious..."

"I still don't know the difference, Cas."

"Oh. Right. I'm not sure how to describe it.  Not that much different from what we did last night, I guess, just a bit more intense.  We covered the gist of it, but we got a little off track... you know, first time and all.  And I went easy on you last night because I didn't want to overstep my bounds.  Mostly it's about trust."

Dean nodded slowly.

"I mean, it wouldn't happen overnight or anything.  But I think we have an advantage over some people since we already have a pretty strong bond of trust.  You're always so in control of things, Dean, except in the bedroom. And it's _so_ beautiful to watch you give up that control.  You let your guard down, and it's so raw and breathtakingly real.  You're a people pleaser.  And the way you submit and take orders, Dean!"  he moaned deep in the back of his throat.  "I get off on controlling and praising, you get off on being controlled and praised..."  He glanced down at Dean nervously, but on the bright side, Dean didn't even seem fazed.    
  
"I don't know, Cas.  Guess I'm willing to experiment a little," he said, stretching upward for a kiss.    
  
Cas smiled.  "It's funny how much you relax when we're alone.  Can I tell you something?"  
  
"Mmmhmm."  
  
"I kinda get off on public displays of affection," Cas whispered.  
  
Dean snorted in laughter.  "Of course you do. Obviously, they kind of freak me out."  
  
"I know... but when you threw yourself at me in front of Sam..."  Cas hummed happily.   
  
Dean rolled his eyes, his face reddening a little.   "Why the hell would you get off on that?"  
  
"I don't know.  It's like... marking my territory," he grinned.   
  
"Fuck," Dean laughed.  "But you have nothing to prove in front of Sam!"  
  
"I know, but I can't help it," Cas grinned impishly.  "I was thinking 'Mmm, that's right.  Your brother is _mine_.'"   
  
"You're terrible," Dean teased.  "You're pretty fuckin' kinky for an angel, you know."  
  
Cas shrugged.  "You bring it out in me."


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I'm much slower than usual. Damn depression is sapping my will to write lately. Have some smut to make up for it?

With a bucket full of supplies, Dean carefully made his way down to the garage. He'd been a little stressed out lately, and working on Baby was his favorite way to relax. He'd gone all out today, gathering all the necessary things to detail the inside as well as the outside.

He opened the driver's side door and settled into his seat, inhaling the familiar scent of old leather. Starting with the dash, he pored over every square inch, humming to himself as he worked. As he stretched to reach the passenger side, he groaned a little. Dammit, he was sore again.

He and Cas had fallen into an easy routine the last few days, and slowly, Dean was getting more comfortable with their... well, relationship. Or at least he was while they weren't around Sam. Cas hadn't talked any more about the whole Dom/sub thing, and Dean was kind of glad he hadn't. He still wasn't really sure about what Cas had in mind, and they were still just getting used to being with each other. Last night, Cas insisted on... well, it was kind of embarrassing. He'd insisted on 'making love'. Dean had burst out laughing immediately, which seemed to hurt the angel's feelings. So after smoothing things over... they did. And if Dean was being honest with himself, it was the most emotionally intense sex he'd ever had. He'd forgotten how good it felt to wake up next to someone day after day. He hadn't had that since Lisa, and as good as it was with her, something never felt quite right for him. Maybe he just wasn't himself because Sam was gone then, or maybe it was something else altogether. Whatever it was, he didn't have that 'lost' feeling with Cas. In fact, everything about it felt pretty damn good.

He picked up a cotton swab and worked it into the tiny crevices on the instrument panel as he let his mind wander some more.

He shook his head as he thought about how surreal the whole thing was. God, he'd been drooling over Cas for years. Every so often when they were in bed together, he'd think about how strange it was to feel hairy legs against his own, or to feel the rough scrape of stubble against his cheek. It was like Cas could sense that little moment of panic, because he'd take that moment to suck on the little pulse point in his neck that made him shivery and horny as hell at the same time. Obviously, the moment of doubt never lasted long, and next thing he knew, he'd be practically begging Cas to take him again. They were officially in the 'honeymoon ' stage of their relationship, and some days it was damn near all Dean could think about.

"Hello, Dean. " That deep, grumbly voice suddenly sent a shiver up his spine, and he glanced up see Cas in the rearview mirror.

"Jesus, Cas, " Dean grumbled. "Scare the shit out of me, why dontcha? "

"I'm sorry, " Cas said, meeting his gaze. "When Sam said you were down working on the car, I thought I'd come watch you in your element," he teased. "You're very thorough."

"Yeah, well, Baby deserves it. She's been through hell and back with us. Hell, we practically lived in this car for years. Until we found the bunker, she was really the only thing I've ever owned, you know?"

Cas nodded and smiled fondly as he watched Dean spray glass cleaner on a paper towel and work it over the windshield."So have you done the exterior yet?"

Dean frowned. " Not yet. I just started a few minutes before you got here. Why?"

"I suppose this may take a while?" he asked.

"Just most of the afternoon," Dean winked. "Why? You got something better planned?"

Cas shrugged innocently. "Oh, you know..."

Dean snorted and rolled his eyes. "I'm not complaining, but shit, I can still barely walk from last night."

"I should have healed you, " Cas lamented.

Dean shook his head and laughed. "It's just sex, Cas. It's not that bad I guess, just a dull throbbing and muscles getting a workout every night. You're kind of huge. I think my ass is just going to have to get used to it."

Cas grinned. "Well if you're sure... I thought you might like to try what we talked about the other night."

"Oh," Dean swallowed hard. "What did you have in mind? "

In a second, Cas was suddenly in the front seat next to him. "Oh, I don't know... thought we'd start with this..."

Cas pulled a pink collar encrusted with rhinestones out of his coat pocket.

"What the hell is that?"

"I bought it for you. Thought if we're going to play, you should wear the collar I choose."

Dean rubbed his temples in exasperation. "Cas, I am not wearing that girly pink abomination."

Cas smiled coyly. "Yes you are. Because it would make me happy. And you're always a good boy for me, aren't you, Dean?" he purred as he nuzzled against Dean's ear.

Dean hummed low in his throat. "Dammit, Cas..."

"Whaaat?"

"Fine, but lock the damn doors."

Cas grinned and waved his hand, and the entrances to the garage immediately locked.

"You get off on embarrassing me now?" Dean asked.

"Oh, Dean. If you didn't want to, you'd refuse. Truth is, you like being pushed outside of your comfort zone," Cas teased. "You like the excuse to try dirty new things, don't you?"

"Shut up," Dean mumbled, his face flushing red.

Cas just smiled and fastened the collar around his neck. "What's your safeword, sweetheart? "

"Impala, " Dean breathed, shivering a little at how easily the term of endearment slipped from Cas's mouth.

"Good boy. Now, the collar isn't the only pink thing I got for you," he said slyly.

"Cas..."

"Uh uh. When the collar is on, you call me 'sir'.

Dean huffed indignantly. " Fine. Sir. I don't like wearing pink."

"Don't be silly. It's just a color. And I think it suits you. Get out of the car and take your clothes off for me. "

Sonofabitch, why the hell was he so turned on already? Dean stepped out of the Impala and stripped down to his boxers. "Sir," he said firmly, "I don't feel good about putting my naked ass on the leather interior."

Cas bit back a grin. "You're awfully sassy. Do I need to spank you already?"

Dean huffed and gritted his teeth defiantly.

"Don't worry. You won't be naked. You'll be wearing these." He pulled a pair of lacy pink panties out of his pocket.

Dean's jaw dropped. _That fuckin' kinky little bastard._ "I... don't want to wear them. Sir," he added anxiously.

"Of course you do, " Cas challenged. "I picked them out just for you. You'll look so good in them, sweetheart. I suppose you could safeword, but I think you can manage. Come on, be a good boy for me and put them on," Cas purred.

Dean swallowed hard, wondering what it said about him that he was horny just thinking about it. To be honest, it wouldn't be the first time he'd worn pink panties. _Damn that Rhonda Hurley..._

"Fine," he muttered, letting his boxers slip to the floor. He pulled the panties up over his hips and sighed as he looked down. Actually they didn't look that bad. The satin panel in the front made his junk look huge, and the lace sides were stretchy, not stiff and itchy like he thought they'd be.

Cas hummed his approval. "Good boy. You look beautiful. Now come here." He pulled Dean back down into his seat and clipped a matching pink leash to the collar. He ran his fingers through the front of Dean's hair as he watched his entire body flush as pink as his panties. "You don't seem to hate it that much," Cas suggested, glancing down at the raging erection that was just barely concealed by a scrap of pink satin.

Dean thought about telling him to shut up again, and then thought better of it. Being a smartass when Cas was in this mode was only going to earn him a spanking... which frankly, he kind of liked too. Still, the thrill of Cas's little touches and praise when he behaved was much more appealing, so he kept his mouth shut.

Cas lazily leaned back in his seat and unzipped his pants. He inched them down his hips just enough to expose himself as Dean watched hungrily.

"Suck," Cas demanded, fisting the back of Dean's hair and shoving his face into his lap.

 _And holyfuckingshit, if that didn't turn Dean on._ He practically gagged himself trying to deep throat him in his aroused state.

"Mmmm... Good boy," Cas breathed. "So eager. You like making me happy, baby, or you just like the taste of my cock that much?"

Dean nearly choked again. Were these words really coming out of Cas's mouth? "Both," he mumbled.

Cas hummed happily in the back of his throat. "That's my good boy, " he whispered as Dean came at him harder, shifting his legs out the car door as he lay across the bench seat. "You like when I make you do things, don't you?" Cas let his hand wander down his back, slipping his fingers over the silky satin panties.

" Mmmhmm, " Dean moaned.

Cas grinned. "I'm going to make you love being affectionate in public... One of these days you'll be begging for me to touch you while we're out..."

Dean laughed nervously. "Good luck with that. Sir," he muttered as he pulled back for a second.

"Oh it'll happen, " Cas insisted. "You just need to be trained properly."

Dean pulled back again, a trail of saliva following him. "Trained, sir?" he asked.

"You'll see. And did I tell you you could stop sucking my cock?"

"N...no Sir. Sorry, Sir." Dean dove forward and worked his lips back down and Cas stroked his hair comfortingly.

"You know, on second thought, we'd better stop. I think I'd like to fuck you over the hood of this car," Cas said nonchalantly.

Dean's hips bucked excitedly.

"Problem with that?"

"Um..." The thought of it was ridiculously arousing, but with Dean being a 'car guy'... "I just don't want to scratch it or..."

"Get out of the car."

"What?"

"Did I stutter? Get out of the car."

Dean flinched, not quite sure what was about to happen.

Cas zipped up and exited his side of the car, then began digging through the trunk. "You still remember your safeword, right?"

Dean nodded.

"Good," Cas slammed the trunk shut and grabbed his wrist, leading him to the front of the car. He kissed him firmly then shoved him forward across the hood of the car and quickly knotted a rope around one of his wrists.

"What are you..."

"Shhh." Cas tied a rope around the other wrist and secured each to the side mirrors on the car and Dean moaned. He was bent over the hood of the Impala with his arms spread wide, wearing nothing but a pair of pink lacy panties, and he was pretty sure he was going to come right then and there.

Cas walked around the car, admiring his work. "I don't think I'll ever be able to shake this image from my head," he said softly. He reached over and stroked down Dean's spine, making Dean moan and arch into his touch. "Look at you. How beautifully submissive you've gone... You want me to fuck you across the hood of the Impala, baby?"

The tiny nagging thoughts about Baby's paint job were quickly being forgotten as Cas began sliding the panties down to his knees.

"Mmm. Just like this," Cas purred, grabbing his hips and slamming them against his own. "I want to see you come all over the hood of this car," he teased, knowing full well Dean was probably freaking out about dirtying Baby, but he was going to keep pushing as far as Dean would let him.

"I hope it doesn't ruin the paint job..." Dean softly.

"Hmm? Did you say something, baby? Because I didn't hear you address me properly." Cas murmured.

"S...sorry, Sir."

Cas's hand glided down his back and over his ass. "You know I love you, but we have rules for a reason. So I'm going to spank you now. And after that, I'm going to fuck you. But only after you beg me to."

Dean's brain was so clouded with lust he couldn't think straight. Cas's hand reeled back and planted a firm slap across his right cheek and Dean yelped in a mixture of pleasure and pain.

"Good boy," Cas soothed, gently rubbing the affected area. "Now back to the car. Do you think it's hard to clean come off the paint?" He leaned over Dean's body and began kissing and nipping at his shoulder.

"I... I don't know. Sir."

"I hope we don't scratch it... " he teased, running his tongue down the length of his spine. Dean shivered violently. He was so confused at the moment, crazy out-of-his-mind with lust and still clinging to a few niggling thoughts about hurting his car.

Cas pulled back and knelt behind him, digging his fingers into Dean's ass and spreading his cheeks, making him gasp in surprise. "If I fuck you too hard, do you think we'll dent the hood?" he breathed, tonguing over his hole and making Dean mewl frantically. Cas smirked and ran his fingers over him, that familiar warm feeling making Dean twitch and moan. He ran a wet finger in circles around him and when he slipped it inside of him, Dean practically growled.

"S...Sir!" Dean gasped. "Please. Just fuck me! Please!"

"Hmmm, I don't know. I'm kind of worried about the car now..." Cas said, smiling to himself as he nuzzled against his back and wiggled his finger until he was caressing his prostate.

Dean whined loudly. "I don't care! Please, Sir!"

"You might come all over the hood..."

Dean whimpered impatiently. "I want to!"

"You want to what?" Cas asked slyly.

"I want to come all over the damn car!" he panted. He was getting frustrated now. "Please, Sir! Pleeeease."

"Mmmhmm, there's my good boy," Cas grinned. Quickly, he stripped off his pants and lubed himself up. He lined up and shoved into him hard, gripping his hips and pausing for a moment as Dean groaned.

"Oh god... thank you...thank you," Dean whimpered. "Sir!"

"Mmm. My perfect little angel. Begging me to make you mess up the car... you have no idea how much that turns me on..." Cas grunted as he started to find his rhythm.

Dean couldn't move if he tried. His cheek was pressed against the hood of the car and he was drooling a little more than he'd like to admit. His wrists were already raw from pulling against the ropes and his legs were aching from being bent in this position, but he didn't care. He was already so drunk on endorphins he was euphoric. Cas sped up, timing his thrusts with Dean's frenzied moaning, finding that spot that rubbed just right inside of him.

"Think you can come without me touching your dick, sweetheart? " Cas whispered.

"I... I don't know, sir," Dean gasped.

"Let's find out..." Cas sped up to a supernaturally fast pace as Dean thrashed helplessly beneath him.

Dean's entire body felt hot. He felt a little winded and as if he might pass out at any minute. _Holy shit, he just needed to come already._ Sex with an angel was awesomely overwhelming, and he was still pretty sure that Cas was taking it easy on him. He was drooling harder now, and noises that he didn't even know he could make were slipping from his lips at an alarming rate. He was quickly reaching the point of over-stimulation and his legs weren't going to hold out much longer.

"S...s...Sir? " he trembled. " P...please. I can't... I need to..." Tears were slipping down his face, he was so overwhelmed.

"Shhh... okay, sweetheart. I've got you..." Cas waved a finger in the general direction of the ropes and they both fell away. He scooped Dean up to a standing position, gave his palm a lick, and reached around to stroke him.

It only took a few seconds for Dean to succumb to Cas's skilled touch. Cas was still stroking and thrusting away as Dean closed his eyes and gave a strangled yell.

"No. Watch," Cas whispered.

Dean tried to open his eyes but they kept squeezing shut as he moaned.

"Mine," Cas growled, slamming into him harder as Dean began to come, as promised, all over the hood of the Impala.

The visual was way too much for Cas, who groaned and fell forward, shoving Dean face first into his mess as he let his orgasm overtake him.

Cas bit down on his shoulder and let loose a litany of undignified noises as Dean tried unsuccessfully turn his head enough to kiss him.

"I love you," Cas panted. "My beautiful angel, " he sighed. "You did so well for me today."

Dean blushed as he tried desperately to catch his breath. "Th...thank you, Sir..."

Cas let him up and spun him around for a long, lingering kiss. "I think we should stop playing now, sweetheart. Is that okay with you? "

Dean nodded as Cas pulled him in close to his chest and nuzzled his hair.

"That was amazing, Dean..." Cas finally managed.

Dean stood there a minute, still a tad in shock.

"Let's get you cleaned up, " Cas said softly, pressing two fingers to his forehead. He did the same to himself, and then, to Dean's relief, to the Impala as well. He located Dean's pants and helped him back into them before finding his own, then he carefully pulled Dean into the back seat with him.

Dean slumped into his chest out of sheer exhaustion. "Holy _shit_ , Cas. Where the hell did you learn to talk like that? Or _do_ that, for that matter."

"Was it too much? "

"Hell no, it was fucking hot! I just didn't expect it..."

Cas's face flushed a little. "I told you, I've done my research, " he said simply.

"On who?"

 "Not like that, Cas laughed.  "You're my guinea pig, Dean," he winked. "You need to safeword if I do something that makes you uncomfortable."

Dean nodded. "No, that was perfect. I'm still trying to figure out how you got me to beg you to make me come on Baby..."

Cas grinned. "That's how you train someone, Dean, " he teased. " You're going to be begging me to make you do all sorts of things you wouldn't expect."

Dean snorted and rolled his eyes. "We'll see." He scrunched down in the seat and curled into a ball, resting his head on Cas's lap.

"You're so good for me, Dean..." Cas sighed as he ran his fingers through Dean's now-sweaty hair. "You are so gorgeous after we have sex too... that bottom lip all red and puffy from biting on it... the way your whole body blushes and shows off your freckles..." Cas gazed down at him fondly. "The way you get all sweet and clingy afterwards..."

"M'not clingy," Dean mumbled through a yawn.

"Yes you are. And it's my favorite part, " Cas whispered.

Dean huffed indignantly. "Well _you_ spend some time with a huge dick in your ass, and see if you don't get a little sappy afterward."

Cas smiled. "You're adorable. "

"I know. "

"And so modest."

" Mmmhmm, " Dean mumbled sleepily.

Cas grinned and shook his head, shifting to a more comfortable position. It was only early afternoon, but he had a feeling Dean was going to need a while to recover today. "Night, Dean."

" Night, Cas."


	12. Chapter 12

"Mmmphh," Cas groaned as Dean pulled away from his grip. "Do you have to go?"

Dean laughed as he pulled on a clean pair of boxers. "I think Sammy's gonna kick my ass if I don't. I really should go do some work though. Been slacking off lately. "

"Give me ten more minutes," Cas pleaded, reaching a hand out to pull him back down on the bed.

"Cas, Sam's ready to go and I still have to shower... Ohhh, " he moaned as Cas's lips latched onto his neck. " _Five_ , " he mumbled.

"Deal," Cas grinned. "Dean..." he started as he kissed his way across his jaw. "I want to play today. "

Dean shook his head and laughed. "You're insatiable. I won't be home until late tonight, " he said. "And honestly, I'll probably be exhausted. I assume we'll be grave-digging again."

"I know. I just want to have a little control over you while you're gone..." he said slyly.

"What?"

"Wear the panties for me today, sweetheart, " he whispered against Dean's ear.

Dean blushed. "Cas!  You won't even see them I'll be gone all day!  And what's with the cutesy pet names lately?"

Cas grinned. "I know, but you'll think about me all day while you have them on.  And I think the pet names are kind of fun in the bedroom..."

"Jesus, you're kinky. Where the hell did you learn this shit?" Dean asked in amusement.

Cas ignored his question "Come on. Wear them for me," he breathed. "I'll reward you when you get home."

Dean's face flushed again. "It'll be so uncomfortable while I'm trying to work," he argued.

"Hmmm... reward if you're good, spanking if you're bad?" Cas winked. "Your choice, sweetheart.  Unless you safeword I suppose, but what would be the fun in that?"

Goddammit, they weren't even playing right now, and Dean was achingly hard just thinking about it.

"Dean! Are you ready to go? " Sam's voice suddenly called up the stairs.

"Uh. Just gotta shower, Sammy!"

Cas dangled the pink panties in front of him and grinned.

"Dammit, Cas..."  He snatched them from his hand and gathered up the rest of his clothes for the day.  "You're terrible."

"You love it," Cas teased.

"Mmm, I kind of do," Dean sighed, giving him a quick kiss.  "I gotta go.  Will you be here tonight?"

"Of course.  I'll just be waiting here with your collar in hand..."

Dean felt his entire body flush. Dammit, he was horny again.  "Alright, I gotta go before Sam kills me!" he said.  "See you tonight."

Cas surged forward and locked him in a long, teasing kiss.  "Mmm. Tonight," he agreed.

Dean hurried off to the bathroom before he could change his mind again.  He flipped on the shower and closed his eyes, breathing in the warm steam that was starting to rise.  On second thought, maybe he'd better make this a cold shower.  He turned the dial to a cooler temperature and sighed.  He really needed to calm down.  And not just right now, he had sex on the brain 24/7 lately. It was worse than puberty. If someone had told him a few months ago that he'd be craving Cas's _dick_ non-stop, he'd have laughed in their face. After he punched it, of course. Aside from the obvious, he wondered what was so damn different about being with Cas. And why it was so damn _addictive_. Maybe because he and Cas had been good friends for so long.  Or maybe it was because he didn't have to worry about being judged - Cas just indulged his twisted little fantasies without batting an eye. He was also good at gently pushing the bounds of his comfort zones, which, for some reason turned him on more than anything. Of course, there was no real worry since Cas was adamant about safewords; he could stop it at any time, but he was kind of enjoying the excuse to try some kinky new things. It didn't hurt that Cas heaped on the praise afterward.

God, he had to stop thinking about it. He turned off the water and stepped out of the shower, reaching for a towel to dry himself.  He slipped a t-shirt over his head and stared at the panties in front of him. Was he really going to do this? What if he moved just right and Sammy saw them?  God, he was going to sweat his ass off riding on leather seats in the hot sun all day.  This shiny polyester stuff was just going to make him sweat more.  And the last thing he needed was to have his underwear chafing and riding up while chasing down some Big Bad. He sighed. He just couldn't do it.

"Sorry, Cas, " he mumbled as he shoved the panties into his jacket pocket. He slipped back into his boxers, threw on his jeans and jacket and flew downstairs.

It was nearly midnight by the time he and Sam finished their salt n' burn. Dean was sweaty and exhausted, and covered in graveyard dirt to boot.  He threw his head back against the seat and closed his eyes, sighing heavily.  He was so freakin' tired.   His eyes flew open when he heard Sam laugh as he climbed into the front seat next to him.

"You might want to hide those from Cas," he snorted.

"What?"

Sam pointed to the pink panties hanging out of his pocket. "I don't know if he's the jealous type or not, but I'd hide the girl's panties anyway. "

Dean grabbed at the underwear, frantically shoving them back in his pocket. "Fuck," he muttered, feeling his entire body go warm with embarrassment.

Sam just chuckled and looked out his window. They rode in an awkward silence for a few minutes before something occurred to Sam.

"You're not cheating on Cas, are you?" he suddenly blurted.

"No! I'm not cheating on Cas! I guess they've just been in my jacket a while," he lied.

Sam smiled. "Good. You know, it still weirds me out a little, but he's really good for you, Dean. "

Dean's face was burning. "Yeah... I don't wanna talk about it, Sammy. "

Sam nodded. "I know... why are you so jumpy about it anyway? I mean, it's alright. But you get all flustered every time I even mention him lately. "

Dean sighed. "I just don't like talking about relationship stuff. How many times have I talked about Lisa? And I lived with her for a long time.  Hell, I haven't had that many relationships and I'm sure as hell not good at them."

Sam considered this. It was true. For as long as he was with Lisa, Sam knew fuck-all about their relationship.

"And this is," he paused. "Different."

"How so?"

Dean looked at him pointedly, raising an eyebrow as if to say, 'really?'

Sam laughed. "Besides the obvious!"

"It just is."

Sam took that as his cue to shut up. "Well regardless, you're good together. " He returned his attention to the darkened scenery passing by his window.

Dean focused on the road ahead, letting his mind wander a bit. It was weird to hear Sam say that. All the years he'd worried about how Sam might react... Frankly, he wasn't sure of his _own_ reaction when he first realized he had feelings for Cas. He'd been scared and confused.  Fuck, he'd come a long way. Now he was practically drooling to get back home to his... uh... _boyfriend_.  
  
There. He'd said it. At least to himself.  
  
It still felt weird to say. Whatever. He was just happy to be going home to Cas, who... _Oh shit_.  Who was going to be disappointed in him for not playing along today. Now he felt bad. The thought of it was a huge turn on this morning, but it just wasn't practical. 

He sighed. He hated letting Cas... no. His _Sir_ down. Unless he safeworded, he was going to get spanked for sure. Which wasn't the worst thing. He liked being spanked. _A lot_. But not when he'd let his master down.

He shook his head. What the hell? It was so easy for him to slip into a scening mindset now. It was kind of weird if he thought about it too much. Still, this was something that he never knew he needed in his life. There were so many times when it felt like his world was spinning out of control. Giving up all control to Cas was liberating. It was discipline and structure, but also love and deep mutual trust.

Of course, they didn't play this game _every_ time they had sex. That would be too demanding. After all, they had sex _a lot_. It was always amazing, but there was something particularly thrilling about the kinky stuff.

Dean shifted uncomfortably in the driver's seat and sighed He was fucking horny again. At his age, it was kind of exhausting. It's like his dick was stuck in puberty while the rest of him kind of wanted to take a nap.

He turned the car onto their street and eased Baby into the garage.

"You want first shower? " Dean asked.

"Nah, screw it. I'll shower in the morning. I'm too damn tired. Goin' straight to bed. "

Dean nodded and made his way up to his bedroom.

As he opened the door, Cas immediately pounced on him, wrapping his arms around his neck and kissing him for all he was worth.

"Whoa, I missed you too," Dean laughed. "But I really need to shower first. I stink."

"Let me see first, " Cas whispered, fumbling with the button on Dean's pants.

Dean sighed. "No. I didn't do it, " he mumbled.

Cas paused and pulled back. "Why not?"

"I just. .. I was worried about Sammy seeing, and I thought they'd be uncomfortable, and..."

"Why didn't you safeword if it bothered you?"

Dean shrugged. "It doesn't _bother_ me that much. I mean, it just seemed... uh.   _Inconvenient_ ," he struggled.  Damn.  That was a horrible reason.  Why didn't he just do it anyway?

"I see," Cas said sullenly. "Go shower. And you'd better have this on when you come back," he said, dropping the collar into his hands.

Cripes, such a small gesture shouldn't have him ready to come in his pants...

"Yes Sir," he said breathlessly.  He took the quickest shower of his life, both in excitement and apprehension.  He had no idea what was about to happen, and yet he couldn't wait.

He dried off quickly, and picked up his shorts, but hesitated for a moment.   Maybe he could make up for not obeying today.  He grabbed the panties out of his coat pocket and slipped them up his legs, then turned to look at himself in the mirror.   Fuck it, he looked good.  He didn't realize he had a panty fetish, but suddenly all he could think about was getting Cas into a pair. Maybe someday he'd go all Dom on him, but for now, he was still enjoying being the submissive one in the relationship. Well, at least in bed.

Dean wrapped the towel around his waist and fastened the collar around his neck, smiling a little at the shiny pink monstrosity.  Such a bastard, that Cas.  He took a deep breath and peeked out the door.  Sam was nowhere to be found, so Dean quickly dashed to his bedroom before anyone could see him.

Cas greeted him by immediately clipping a leash to his collar.  "Hello, sweetheart, " he said softly.

"Hello, Sir," Dean said, trying hard not to laugh.   Such formalities.

"I was so looking forward to rewarding you tonight," he said sadly.   "But instead, I have to punish you."  He looked so disappointed that Dean swallowed back a lump in his throat to avoid tears.

"Well, let's get it over with," he said, sitting on the edge of the bed.   He grabbed Dean's arm and pulled him closer.  " Drop the towel," he commanded.

Slowly, Dean unwrapped the towel and let it fall to the floor, watching Cas's face as he tried to hide back a grin.

"What's this for?"  Cas asked.

Dean hung his head.   "To apologize,  Sir."

"Why are you apologizing? "

"I didn't obey today.   I knew it would make you happy,  but I still didn't do it."

Cas nodded.   "If it was scary, you should have safeworded. "

"It wasn't scary!  I don't know why I didn't do it," Dean sighed.

"I was going to make you drop the pants, but I think your panties will suffice.  Come on," he said, patting his lap.  "Let's get it over with. "

Dean looked at him awkwardly.   "What do you want me to do?  Sir."

"Bend over my knee," Cas instructed. "Ass up.   _Now_."

Fuck's sake, why the hell was he so hard already?  Dean tried to balance himself over Cas's legs, leaning on the bed for support.

"That's good," Cas whispered as he rubbed his ass through the silky material.   "You're aroused,  baby," he said as he felt Dean's erection digging into his lap.  "You get off on disappointing me?"

"N...no Sir. "

"Hmm.   Then you like your punishment? "  His hand slipped into the back of Dean's underwear and he slowly traced a finger up the crack.

Dean whimpered.   "Y...yes, Sir.  A little,  Sir."

Cas pulled his hand away and suddenly slapped him hard on his right cheek.

Dean tried to bite back a grin. Fuck, he enjoyed this a little too much.

"Not much of a punishment if you enjoy it," Cas frowned.  "I may need to rethink this."

Dean groaned.   "No,  this is good, Sir."

"That's the problem, " Cas said. "Well, I think a few more are in order for today anyway. Reach under the bed and hand me that bag," Cas demanded.

Dean barely balanced himself as he rooted under the bed, and he pulled up a bag branded with the logo of a local sex shop. Cas snatched it away before he could peek inside.

"I wonder if you'll still enjoy spankings with the paddle..." Cas mused.

Dean practically growled as Cas's new paddle cracked down on his ass. _Okay, that stung like a bitch._ He may not have liked the pain, but he still found the discipline exciting.

Cas let the paddle smack into him again and he yelped.

"That's more like it," Cas said softly. "I don't want to hurt you, but it needs to sting or you'll never learn." He glided his hand over the sore area soothingly. "You're taking it like a good boy though. Just a few more..."

The paddle slapped into him again and Dean groaned. _That one brought tears to his eyes._

" One more sweetheart." Dean whimpered loudly as it slapped him again. The tears were making their way down his cheeks now. _Goddammit that stung._

"Good. You always take your discipline so well," he said proudly. He pulled down his panties and gently rubbed the pinkened skin. "Stay still," he instructed. A second later, Dean felt him apply something wet that immediately cooled the area, and he sighed in relief.

"What's that? Sir?" Dean asked.

"Just a little aloe gel.  Should take away the sting.  Is it helping?" he asked as he pulled his underwear back up.

Dean nodded gratefully.

"Good.  Now come snuggle with me, sweetheart."

Dean stood and Cas slid back on the bed, pulling him down next to him. "I don't like having to discipline you.  If you had safeworded or had a good reason for not doing it..."

"I know, Sir.  I'm sorry."

Cas smiled softly.  "All is forgiven."  He brushed away a stray tear with his thumb, and Dean snuggled in closer.   "You're still my good boy. I love you, you know."

"I love you too, Sir."  Dean closed his eyes tiredly.  This took a lot out of him, both physically and emotionally.

"I guess I need to scale down my challenges for you though.  I had something much more intense planned for next time you went out."

"What is it, Sir?  No, I don't care.  I'll do it.  For you."

Cas kissed his forehead.  "Mmm, sweet boy.  It's not just for me though.  It's for you too. I want you so achingly hard for me when you get home... Want to show you how much better that release feels when you have to wait."

Dean licked his lips hungrily. "I want that too."

"I also want you secretly vulnerable in public... want you horny and thinking about my cock all day long."

_Fuck, he was panting with need already. How did Cas always manage to do this to him?_

"H... how are you going to do that, Sir? "

Cas smiled. "Have you ever used a prostate massager?"

Dean swallowed hard. "Yes."

" Good. I took the gentleman's advice at the sex shop and modified one a bit. Now it's suitable to wear all day."

Holy _fuck_. 

"You don't have to do it," Cas said sincerely.

"Want to, Sir," Dean panted. "Holy shit do I want to..."

Cas practically purred in approval. "Oh sweetheart. Do this for me and I'll give you the surprise of your life..."

 _Well that sounds intriguing_ , Dean thought.

"Let's stop playing for tonight," Cas said. "I can tell that you're sleepy."

"Yes Sir."

Cas ruffled his hair gently. "Dean? "

"Mmm?"

"Punishment takes a lot out of you, huh?"

Dean nodded sleepily.  
  
"Still like the spanking a little too much?" Cas teased.  
  
" _Fuck_ , that hurt!" Dean laughed.   "I like it a lot less now. Still don't  _hate_ it though..."  
  
Cas rolled his eyes.  "Hmm.  Well they make all sorts of spanking implements, you know..."  
  
Dean just chuckled.  "I'm tired but all this dirty talk has me wound up.  I wouldn't refuse a goodnight blowjob..." he said slyly.

"Not on punishment night," Cas laughed softly.

Dean frowned. "Aw, come on. All that and you're gonna leave me hangin'?"

Cas nodded and grinned. "Shoulda worn the panties today, sweetheart.   Are you really going to try the massager for me?"  
  
"Hrmph.  Not _now_."  
  
Cas laughed.  "Petulant little thing when you don't get your way, aren't you?  If I reward you now, you'll never learn," he teased.   
  
Dean sighed and reached a hand down his lacy panties.   
  
"Uh uh," Cas said, smacking his hand away.  "You don't get to touch yourself either."  
  
" _Cas_ ," he whined in frustration.   
  
Cas suddenly lunged forward, roughly pinning his body to the bed with his own.  "Are you going to wear it for me tomorrow?" he growled.   
  
Dean's startled face stared up at him helplessly.   "Yeah.  Fuck, yeah, Cas.  I'll wear it.  All day," he panted lustfully.  "And I'll think about you fucking me the whole time."  
  
Cas smiled, then leaned forward, kissing him hard.  "In that case, maybe one little blowjob before bed..."


	13. Chapter 13

Dean couldn't believe he was about to do this.  Yet here he was, naked and bent over on the bed, watching Cas lube up a prostate massager.

"You're shaking," Cas said quietly.  "Nervous, sweetheart?"

"Yes, Sir."

"Why?"

Dean rolled his eyes.  "Oh because I'm about to go out in public with something shoved up my ass all day?" he said sarcastically.

Cas snapped at him with the paddle.

"Sir!" Dean corrected himself quickly.

"That's better, but still awfully mouthy... You could safeword, you know."

Dean shook his head determinedly.  "No.  I told you I'd do it.  Sir."

"Good boy.  Now just relax," Cas gently inserted a medicine dropper filled with lube inside of him and squeezed, the cold feeling making him shiver.  "Okay, here we go," he removed the dropper and began to slip the toy inside him.

Dean grunted and bit his lip.

"Now I lubed you up pretty well, but if this gets too uncomfortable or starts to hurt, you can take it out, sweetheart. Otherwise I expect you to wear it."

Dean nodded.

"Stand up, Cas commanded.

Dean obediently stood, groaning a little as the massager shifted, and Cas immediately wrapped his arms around him, grinning widely.

"I can't even tell you how much this turns me on, " Cas murmured as he kissed him frantically . "Now get dressed."

Dean carefully managed to get his 'FBI' suit on without too much discomfort. "Sir, can we stop playing now? "

Cas nodded. "How does it feel, Dean?" he asked.

Dean rolled his eyes. "Look at you. You're so proud of yourself," he teased, watching Cas try to hide his grin. "You know I'm going to get you back for this..."

"I know.  I love you in that suit by the way..." Cas hummed appreciatively.

"Dean?" a voice suddenly called up the stairs. "Let's go!"  By the tone of his voice, Sam was getting a little tired of waiting.  Dean couldn't really blame him.  He'd stalled too long this morning in favor of making out with Cas.

Dean sighed. "Coming, Sammy!"

Cas tried to stifle a laugh. "Already?"

"I am so gonna kick your ass," Dean grumbled, shooting him a withering look.

Cas just grinned and gave him a peck on the cheek. "See you tonight."

::::::::::::::

Dean clenched his teeth as he slid into the Impala's front seat. He had to admit, it wasn't nearly as bad as he thought it would be. At least not yet.  It was just when he sat, or moved, or bent over...  yeah, he was screwed. He'd played around with a prostate massager before, but he never understood what the big deal was. Everyone promised mind-blowing multiple orgasms, but it just felt like a butt plug to him. Apparently he hadn't been doing it right, because he was already pretty damn stimulated.    
  
The strange thing was, he was kind of excited to be doing something so unlike himself in public. There was something ridiculously exhilarating about the possibility of being caught. Holy shit, he really _was_ an exhibitionist...  Still, it was making him a little paranoid. Every time Sam looked at him, he was sure he'd see right through him.  The last thing he needed was for Sam to figure out he had something shoved up his ass.  Oh god, this day could not go quickly enough.

Thankfully, they weren't going far from home today.  The job they were working on was only about a 45-minute drive from the bunker, so that was something to be thankful for.  It was a simple salt n' burn too, so all they needed to do was ask this guy a few questions, then wait it out until nightfall at the closest motel.  Quick and easy.

Everything seemed to be going well until they got close to their destination, and the GPS on Sam's phone directed them down an unpaved dirt road.

"You sure this is where the guy lives?" Dean asked doubtfully, looking forward at nothing but forest on either side of them.

Sam nodded. "Yep.  We turn onto another road eventually. "

Dean sighed as he narrowly missed a pothole.  "Ever hear of paving?" he grumbled. He jerked the wheel to avoid another. And then another. The further they went, the worse the road became.

"Sonofabitch, " Dean breathed as he realized he could no longer avoid them. There were small holes littering the entire damn road. Not only was he worried about Baby's suspension, but he was actually more worried about his ass.  He slowed the car to a crawl and clamped his jaw shut as they jounced over the bumps.  Holy shit, he wasn't going to survive the next five minutes, nevermind the rest of the day. The more the massager rubbed against him, the more his muscles started clenching, and his face contorted helplessly. Shit. Oookay, nothing like having a mini dry orgasm in front of your brother.

"Relax, the car will be fine," Sam suddenly said. "She's been through worse."

"Ohh," Dean panted. "Yeah. " His whole body felt hot and tense and oh god, he needed to come already.  Thankfully he never could without touching himself, so he wouldn't mess his pants _too_ badly, but still, this was fucking intense.

"When you get to the end of the road, turn left," Sam instructed.

Dean swallowed hard and nodded, flipping on his turn signal. Thankfully the next road wasn't nearly as bad, and he took a quick gasp of breath.

"Right here," Sam yelled, as Dean nearly passed the house. "Holy shit, dude, " he exclaimed as he glanced in Dean's direction. "Are you okay? You look absolutely wrecked."

Dean pulled the Impala into the driveway and cut the engine. He nodded weakly. "Yeah. Uh. No. I'm not feeling too well," he managed. He was practically sweating through his suit, and his goddamn muscles were still contracting on their own every so often, which was making him twitch and pant heavily. And oh fuck, he was having a another mini orgasm right in front of Sam.

"Look, I'll go interview the guy and we'll find a motel, okay? Just stay here," Sam said.

Dean couldn't even speak to protest, so he just nodded.  He was also afraid to move.  Besides, it was probably a bad idea for an 'FBI agent' to go interview someone with a raging erection.

"Stay, " Sam commanded as he slammed the car door shut.

Dean slumped against the back against the seat, taking a few deep breaths to calm himself. When he had nearly managed to get it under control, he picked up his phone and texted Cas.

_SMS to Cas: Fuck, I'm dyin' here._

He closed his eyes and lay his head back against the headrest, mopping his forehead with his sleeve.

"Dean, what's wrong? " a voice from the backseat suddenly startled him.

"Fuck!" he yelped. " Cas, what are you doing here? "

"I got your text so I hurried. What happened? "

Dean's brows knitted in confusion. "Oh! Shit. Sorry, Cas. "It's uh, an expression. I'm not _actually_ dying. "

"Oh. Right. I knew that But I guess I couldn't tell over text. So what's up?" Cas popped himself into the front seat next to him. "Whoa," he said, suddenly a bit breathless. "Are you okay? "

Dean whimpered and lay his head on Cas's shoulder. "Fucking potholes on this road... so goddamn overstimulated right now..."

"Oh Dean," Cas said sympathetically.  "Let's take it out."

"I can't! Sammy will be out any minute!"

Cas stroked his hair comfortingly. "Can you pull over at a gas station or restaurant to use the bathroom? "

Dean snorted. "Look around, Cas. We're in the middle of nowhere. And we're probably going to have to go back over the same damn road..." he groaned.

"I'm sorry," Cas whispered. "I should have known this would be too intense for you."

"N...no. I said I'd do it," he said, gritting his teeth again. "I can at least hold out a little longer. "

Cas smiled softly and hummed in approval. "Such a good boy. If it's any consolation, you look _so_ sexy right now. You look like you do after I fuck you hard... all flushed and shaky and sweaty..."

"Cas! No dirty talk! I can't take it," Dean trembled.

Cas smiled. "Sorry. I'm going to stay with you. Let me help you into the back seat. Sam can drive us to the motel. At least, I assume that's where you're headed next."

"I don't think I can move."

Cas got out of the car and circled around to the driver's side. "You can do it," he said gently. "You can lie on your side in the back. At least the bumps won't affect you as badly."

Dean weakly opened his door and stood, moaning as the massager shifted again.

"Cas," he whimpered.

"I know, sweetheart. Come on." Sam was now making his way to the car, and Cas tried to hurry.

Dean crawled into the back seat and tried to lie down, but he was just too damn tall. He wound up in the fetal position, breathing heavily; Unfortunately this seemed to be a rather enjoyable position for the massager. Cas slid in next to him, coaxing his head into his lap as he tenderly rubbed his side.

As Sam came closer, his face was clouded in worry.  Completely ignoring Cas for the time being, he flung open the car door. 

"Dean!  What happened?"

Cas shushed him quickly.  "He's fine.  Just feeling a bit sick.  Probably whatever greasy junk he ate on the way here."

Sam paused.  "We did stop at a drive-thru.  Food poisoning, maybe?"

"Maybe," Cas lied.  "He just needs to lie down and rest.  Can you get us to a motel?"

Sam nodded.  "Yeah.  Of course.  What are you doing here anyway, Cas?"  He quickly shut the door and hopped into the driver's seat.

Cas grimaced.  "Well when Dean texted me that he was dying, I didn't know if he was serious or not.  So I came right away."

Sam shifted the car into gear, and smiled a bit.  "Well thanks, Cas.  Let's see if we can find a motel."

:::::

Sam went into the motel office to make arrangements while Dean lay in the backseat, whimpering and panting shamelessly as Cas stroked his hair.  He was drenched in sweat and his legs were twitching as another mini orgasm wracked his body.

"Few more minutes, baby," Cas whispered.

"Alright, you guys are in room 11, I'm in room 12," Sam said as he opened the back door and attempted to help Dean up.  "You'll tell me if he gets worse, right Cas?  He might need to go to a hospital."

"He'll be fine, Sam.  But yes, I'll let you know if it's anything serious," Cas promised.

Dean suddenly felt a pang of guilt and sadness as he realized Sam booked them separate rooms.  Not that he wanted him to know what was going on with him and Cas right this minute, but they'd never had separate rooms before and it just felt kind of... sad.  Thankfully he was way too fucked up to think much about it.

"Come on, Dean," Cas said softly, walking him to their door.  Dean groaned loudly as slumped into Cas.

"You sure you're okay, Dean?" Sam asked, his face contorted in concern at the tears silently streaming down Dean's cheeks.   "You don't look good at all."

"Yeah.  Just gotta lie down, Sammy," Dean managed.

"I'm right next door..." Sam said helplessly.

"He'll be fine."  Cas assured him calmly and walked Dean inside, closing the door behind him.

Wordlessly, he began working Dean's belt off, followed by his pants and boxer shorts.  When he was naked from the waist down, Cas gently removed and folded his suit jacket and loosened his tie.  He let his white dress shirt slip gently to the ground, eyeing him hungrily as he exposed more of Dean's lightly freckled skin.

"Kick your shoes off," he commanded.   Dean did, and then Cas bent to remove each of his socks.    "There. On the bed, sweetheart. On your back. Just lie down and relax. So what happened?" he asked softly.

"Ohh, just had about a dozen mini orgasms over the past forty minutes," Dean stammered. "No big deal."

Cas nodded and removed his own suit jacket and trench coat as Dean struggled to lie down.

"Hurry, Cas, please, " he begged frantically.

Cas smiled fondly and sat down next to him. "Okay. Bend your knees for me."

Dean grunted and bent his knees, spreading his legs so that Cas could nestle between them.

"Do you want this out or should we wait until you come?"

"In. Come. Now, " Dean panted incoherently. The tears were flowing quickly now as he became more and more overwhelmed.

Cas grinned. "You were such a good boy for me today, " he whispered. "Can you coax yourself through one more for me? Wanna watch you so badly..."

"Caaasss," he whimpered.  
  
"It's okay.  You don't have to, sweetheart."  Cas watched as Dean moaned helplessly, his dick twitching stiffly against his stomach.  "You've been through enough."  
  
"No," Dean said, gritting his teeth.  "I'll try."  He gently worked the massager inside himself, and almost immediately he began thrashing wildly on the bed as another wave of pleasure hit him. "P...please, Cas. It's too much."

Cas nodded and immediately took him into his mouth. He lapped hungrily at the head, which was already soaked and dripping with pre-come, and when he slid his lips up and down the length of him, Dean shuddered violently.

It took all of two minutes before Dean began wailing uncontrollably, and he jerked his hips, nearly choking Cas in the process. "Caaaaasss," he moaned. "Oh fuck..." He tangled his fingers in Cas's dark hair and wrapped his legs around his torso as he sobbed, chanting his name reverently as his orgasm washed over him. He was coming in long, thick spurts, and every time he thought he was finished, the damn massager seemed to coax more out of him.  When he was certain he couldn't possibly come anymore, he went limp on the bed, more exhausted than he could ever remember being. His legs were still twitching involuntarily, and obscenely dirty noises were still spilling from his mouth.

Cas kissed the noises away, using his tongue to distract him as he gently slid the massager out of him. Dean gasped into Cas's open mouth as the fullness inside him disappeared.

"Cas," he blubbered, gripping the angel close to his chest.  "Oh my god..."

Cas laughed and wrinkled his nose at the slimy mess he was being dragged into, but he nuzzled against Dean's cheek anyway.

"That was amazing, Dean," he breathed.

"I... don't think I can do that again, " Dean panted.   "At least not for a while.  Too damn intense."

"Okay sweetheart.   I'm so proud of you for trying it.  That was by far the most amazing thing I've ever seen. "

"Oh shit, sorry, " Dean suddenly said, reaching a hand between them to undo Cas's pants.

Cas laughed.  "No need.  Already there," he said, his face reddening.

"Well good,  because I'm fuckin' exhausted," Dean grinned sheepishly.  "Is it possible to get dehydrated from coming too much?"

Cas snorted.   "I don't think so, but you've been sweating profusely since before I got here.  Let me get you some water. "  He pulled away for a moment and headed to the bathroom, grabbing a disposable cup off the table on his way through.  He filled it with tepid water from the cold tap, and then turned the shower on as well before returning to Dean's side.

"Here.  Drink," Cas demanded, handing him the cup.

Dean guzzled it down in a second, and tiredly lay his head back down on the pillow.

"I'm running the shower for you too."

"Not now, Cas.  I can barely move.".

Cas sighed.   "But you're dehydrated and overheated.  Come."

"I just did.  Repeatedly.  That's the problem ."

Cas rolled his eyes.   Humans were so frail sometimes.   He strode to the bed and scooped Dean up in his arms, carrying him bridal-style toward the bathroom.

"Cas!  What the fuck? " Dean grumbled.  He protested and struggled feebly, but Cas easily held onto him.  Sometimes Dean forgot just how crazy-strong angels were.  As his feet touched the floor of the shower, Dean slumped against the wall, too tired to even support himself.  

"It's cold, Cas.  And my legs are like Jell-O," he whined.

"Well I'll hold you up," Cas said matter-of-factly. "Just let me get undressed. "  He slipped out of his stained clothing as quickly as possible and hopped into the shower behind him.

"Come here, " he whispered.

Dean hugged him tightly, closing his eyes and resting his head on Cas's shoulder.

Cas reached for a washcloth and lovingly began soaping up Dean's back, letting his slippery hands wander as he pulled him in close.

"Such a good boy," he whispered, smiling a little as Dean mewled happily.  "You were so brave for me today."

"Cas, I hunt down monsters every day, and you call _this_ brave?" he muttered sleepily.

Cas shrugged.  "What are you more afraid of?  Monsters or being vulnerable in public?"

Dean considered this for a long moment.  "... _touché_  ."

"Turn around," Cas instructed.

Dean turned, gripping the shower wall for balance until Cas wrapped his arms around him again.  He soaped up his chest as best he could as Dean stood in the cool shower spray, and Dean let his head loll back lazily.

"You're really wrecked, aren't you?" Cas murmured, gently kissing the side of his neck.

"Mmmhmm.  Need sleep.  Wanna snuggle you."

Cas smiled.  "I'll get you to bed in a minute.  Let's get you clean and cooled down first."

Dean nodded.  "Okay."  He sighed happily.  "I have to admit this feels nice.  Thanks, Cas."

"What kind of Dom would I be if I didn't take care of my beautiful little pet afterwards?" Cas said, only half-teasing.

"Pet, huh?"

"Well, you _do_ wear a collar..."

Dean snorted in laughter.  "God, I am so fucked up.  And we weren't even playing..."

Cas shrugged.  "You're not fucked up.  And we were _kind of_ playing... the whole massager thing was from this morning.  But we were pretty lax today.   Regardless, I still need to take care of you afterwards"

"I'm not complainin'."

"Good.  Because you don't have a choice in the matter."  Cas spun him back around and gave him a gentle kiss.  "Now let me wash your hair."

Minutes later, they were back in bed, freshly bathed and snuggled up in each others arms.  Cas was lazily kissing Dean's face and neck, while Dean just lay there, drowsily enjoying the attention.

A sudden knock on the door pulled them from their post-coital bliss, and Cas sighed, reluctantly getting up to answer the door.    
  
"How is he?" Sam asked, nearly shoving past Cas to get a look at his 'sick' brother.  He wrinkled his nose suddenly at the smell of sweat and sex still clinging to the room.

"'M good, Sammy," Dean hummed blissfully.  "I'm good."

Sam pressed a hand to his forehead, doing his usual mama bird routine.  "Well you don't have a fever," he said, relived.

"I just made him take a cold shower," Cas assured him.

"Has he had anything to drink?  He could be dehyd..."

"Yes, I made him drink lots of water, Sam," Cas interrupted.

Dean smiled weakly at his brother's concern.  Okay, he kind of felt like an asshole with Sam fawning over him.  "I'm fine, really.  Much better now."

Sam frowned.  "Did you throw up or anything?"

"Nah, but I think it passed.  Lemme sleep a bit and I think I'll be ready for the salt n' burn by nightfall."

Sam stood and nodded, only half-convinced.  "I'll come back in two hours, and we'll see how you feel.  Cas, can I talk to you?"

Cas bit his lip nervously and headed outside with Sam, who shut the door firmly behind them.

"Look, Cas, thanks for taking care of him.  But uh..."  Sam paused and rubbed at the back of his neck anxiously.  "Maybe you could tone down the sexing until he's feeling better?"

"What?  I..."

"Cas, the whole place reeks of sex.  I know you guys are in that new-relationship-y fuck-like-rabbits phase, but just give him some time to recover first, huh?"

Cas's face flushed beet-red.  "I um.  Yes.  You're absolutely right.  I take full responsibility for my actions."

Sam sighed.  "No, I'm sorry.  Dean's an adult too.  He should know better. I just worry about him, you know?"

"I know.  I do too, Sam.  I promise you, I wouldn't do anything that would jeopardize Dean's health."

"Yeah," Sam smiled.  "I know. There's no one else I'd rather take care of him.  Besides myself of course.  Shit, we really are codependent, aren't we?"

"Maybe a little," Cas chuckled.  "But thanks for sharing him."

Sam laughed, pressing a hand to his face in embarrassment.  "Just take care of him.  I'll be back in a bit."

Cas nodded, giving Sam a pat on the shoulder as he walked away.  
  
"What'd Sammy want?" Dean slurred as Cas came inside and closed the door, peeking out the curtain until he was certain Sam had gone.

Cas grinned sheepishly. "I got in trouble."

"What?"

"For sexing you while you were 'sick'."

"Oh right," Dean said, trying hard not to laugh. "Did you just call it _sexing_? "

Cas shrugged. "That's what Sam called it."

Ugh. Dean couldn't believe his baby brother had just had a 'talk' with his... He sighed.  ...with his _boyfriend_ about 'sexing' him.  He really didn't want to think about it. This whole thing was so surreal sometimes.    
  
"Come lie down with me for a bit," he finally managed.  He needed to ground himself after the emotionally draining day he'd had and all he could think about was getting Cas back in his arms.

"I was planning on it." Cas crawled into bed and wrapped an arm around him.

Dean's sighed contentedly, his breathing eventually becoming slower and deeper as he drifted off toward sleep. As Cas gave him a final peck on the cheek, he stirred, just a little.

"Cas? " he mumbled.

"Hmm?"

"What was the surprise going to be?"

Cas laughed. "Oh you'll still get it. But you were in no shape for it today. We'll save it for another time when you can fully enjoy it."

The suspense was killing him, but to be honest, Dean was too damn tired to argue. "'Kay," he yawned. "Night, Cas. "

"Night, sweetheart."


	14. Chapter 14

Cas's heart was pounding in his chest. He was freezing and sweating at the same time, and although he knew he was breathing fine, he felt like he was gasping for air.  He had been fine when he crawled into bed this evening, so he didn't understand why he suddenly felt like he was dying. He glanced over at Dean, sound asleep and blissfully unaware that anything was wrong.  

He rolled onto his side and curled up in the fetal position, feeling completely miserable.  It wasn't just the physical symptoms - he'd been thinking tonight, about what an absolutely horrible thing he'd done to Dean.  He knew damn well when he suggested wearing the massager that he was pushing Dean far beyond his limit.  And Dean didn't safeword, possibly because he had been so eager to please after letting him down the day before.  He'd pushed him past his physical and emotional limits - in front of Sam -  and he suddenly wondered just how traumatic it had been for him.  

Even worse than the humiliation was the fact that Dean had been physically compromised today.  Sure, it was just a simple salt and burn job, but things could have gone terribly wrong.  This whole stupid thing could have gotten Dean injured or even _killed_.  

Oh god, this whole need for dominance had turned him into a monster.  

"Cas? "  Dean's sleep - heavy voice startled him from his thoughts.  "Stop shaking the bed."

Cas frowned as he realized he was trembling, and he tried desperately to stop, but the harder he tried, the worse it seemed to get.

Dean rolled over and put an arm around his waist.  "What are you do... Cas?  What's wrong? "

Cas opened his mouth to speak, but all that came out was a strangled whimper that quickly turned into a sob.

"Cas..." Dean rolled him onto his back and asked again.  "What happened?"  he asked in a panicked voice.

Cas shook his head.   "I'm so sorry, Dean," he managed, swallowing hard to stifle another sob.  "I'm sorry.  I'm so sorry."

"Cas, you're scaring me.  What's going on? "

"I can't believe I did that to you.  That was horrible of me.  I..." he sniffed.   "I knew your limits and I pushed them anyway.  I should have known that would be way too intense and..."

"Whoa, whoa," Dean interrupted.   "Calm down.  I didn't safeword.  It's okay. "

"It's not okay!" Cas suddenly yelled.   "Dean, you were an absolute mess.  And you were working a _job_!  That could have ended horribly!"

"Well it didn't.  Everything is fine."  Dean rubbed his chest in an attempt to calm him but Cas pulled away.

"It was dangerous and stupid!  And you were so determined to make me happy that you ignored it too!"  Cas sniffled again and wiped the tears from his eyes.  "You could have been  _killed_.  And I'm sure you were traumatized when it happened in front of Sam!"

"Cas..."  Dean sighed.  "I'm fine."  He wiped a stray tear from Cas's face.  "Really.  I knew there were some risk when I did it. Honestly I didn't expect it to get that intense either. But it's okay.  I  _wanted_ to do it.  It felt good to do something I wouldn't normally do.  Well, at first," he grimaced.    "But yeah, I think we both learned a lesson today.  It'd be fine if I were just... I don't know, making a beer run.  We won't do it again while I'm on a job."

Cas nodded vehemently.  "Or ever again."

"Well, let's not get crazy..."

Cas rolled away from him, curling back up in a ball.  "I'm sorry, Dean.  What is _wrong_ with me?  Why do I feel this strange need to be in control?"

Dean frowned, sliding in closer and putting an arm around him.  " _Nothing_ is wrong with you.  It's okay to crave a little control.  I like being able to give up control, Cas.  I feel like I have to keep my shit together all the time, so when I can give up control for a bit... and _be_ controlled - it's heaven."

Cas's brows knit together in disapproval.  "Heaven has nothing to do with sexual domination and submission."

Dean snorted in laughter.  "You know what I mean.  It's good.  It's something I need. And if you need to feel in control sometimes, that's okay too."

Cas shook his head.  "I don't think I can do it anymore.  I can't hurt you."

"Look at me," Dean demanded suddenly.  When Cas didn't move, Dean forcefully rolled him over.   "You didn't hurt me.  You would _never_ intentionally hurt me.  I know that, Cas."

Shaking his head quickly, Cas protested.  "But I _hit_ you, Dean.  With paddles."

"It's not really _hurting_ me.  I mean, it stings.  But I enjoy every minute of it.  I like... no, I _love_  the discipline, Cas.  I like having that little bit of structure in my life. And I know it's weird, but it makes me feel closer to you.  I have so much _trust_ in you when we play.  I've never trusted anyone as much as I trust you."

Cas's eyes began to water again.  "And I let you down by putting you in danger..."

" _No_.  Stop it.  No.  I could have safeworded.  I didn't.  I wanted to do it too. Let's just chalk this one up to a learning experience, okay?"

Cas sighed deeply.

Dean stroked his hair before softly beginning again, "You're so damn good at this, sometimes I forget you've never done this before.  I'm not an expert by any means, but I think you're experiencing something we call 'drop', Cas."

"Drop?"

Dean nodded.  "Come here," he said, pulling Cas in close to his chest.  "Sometimes when you finish a really intense scene, all of your hormones and endorphins are still going crazy.  And when those levels drop quickly it can really mess you up.  It's different for everyone, but sometimes it can make Doms feel depressed or guilty.  It can happen to submissives when they push themselves too far, too..."

"But..."

"Look, this shit can be really demanding, both physically and emotionally," he rubbed Cas's back soothingly as he spoke.  "And it's really easy to get carried away when you're playing.   That's why we have safewords.  I know we haven't really discussed it, but you can safeword too, Cas.  If a scene is getting too intense for you, even if it's something _you_ started, you can stop it at any time.  We're partners in this, understand?"

Cas nodded sullenly.

Dean continued, "Maybe I need to work on a better aftercare routine for you..." he paused. "You know this isn't something we _have_ to do, right?   I mean, we're pretty damn good at plain old vanilla sex, I must say,"  he winked.  "But you're good at this, and I think you enjoy it as much as I do."

"I _do_ like it, " Cas said hesitantly.   "But I don't _want_ to like it."

"Why not?"

"I'm afraid I'll get carried away again.  What if I hurt you?"

Dean shook his head.   "You _won't_ hurt me.  At least not in any way that I don't like." He waggled his eyebrows suggestively.

Cas laughed a little. "I'm serious though, Dean..."

"So am I.  Look, if we do this again, we'll both be more vigilant about what the other is feeling.   If I think you need to safeword and you're not, I'll do it for you.  And same goes for me."

Cas nodded.   "I don't think I can do it again," he said sadly.

Gently, Dean kissed his forehead.  "Well then we'll take a break," he said, softly caressing his face.  "Now dry your eyes and make out with me."

Cas laughed weakly, despite himself. "I love you, Dean, " he said feebly.

"I know you do. I love you too. Stop worrying," Dean said, huffing as Cas clutched him just a little too tightly. 

"Sorry I woke you. You should try to go back to sleep," Cas whispered.

"So that's a 'no' on the making out?" Dean teased.

Cas rolled his eyes and smiled.   "Get some rest.   I've bothered you enough tonight."  He planted a tiny kiss against Dean's lightly-stubbled jaw. 

Dean nodded sleepily and brushed his lips against Cas's forehead before closing his eyes.   He lay there a long time listening to Cas's restless tossing and turning, but he couldn't sleep.  This sudden meltdown was kind of scaring him.  Dean had had a few random kink partners before, but he had never personally experienced drop, and if any of his previous Doms did, they hid it well.  He'd heard stories though, which worried him.    
  
He knew they had rushed into this whole thing too quickly, but Cas just seemed so confident and knowledgeable it was easy to forget that he wasn't experienced. Hell, he never would've suggested anything like this to an inexperienced partner; it had been Cas's idea, and he was damn good at it.    
  
Of course, if this was too much for Cas, Dean would be okay with not doing it again.  But a slightly selfish part of him really hoped that wasn't the case.


	15. Chapter 15

Dean closed his eyes and tipped his head back into the hot shower spray.  He took a deep breath, breathing in the warm steam in an attempt to relax himself.  It was early, he had just crawled out of bed, and he was already in a grumpy mood.

Six days.  It had been six days since Cas had his little breakdown, and while he was busy being extra sweet to Dean, he had been completely avoiding any sort of sexual contact whatsoever.  In the middle of a heated makeout session last night, he suddenly pulled away insisting that Dean needed to get some sleep.  Nevermind that it was true - he _did_ have a job planned with Sam today, but after weeks of fucking like rabbits, this sudden change in him had Dean all sorts of frustrated.  He never thought he'd be aching for a dick in his ass, but there it was.

It wasn't just the sex, either.  Cas seemed kind of lethargic most of the time they were together lately, and he wasn't popping in and out as frequently as usual.  Of course he'd never confront Cas about it.  The rational part of him knew he shouldn't take it personally, that Cas was experiencing a bad case of drop.   He knew Dom drop could sometimes be even more complicated than subdrop due to the nature of guilt, and it might take a while before he felt like himself again. Still, it was hard sometimes when he was feeling downright rejected.

He awoke horny as hell this morning, which didn't help matters.  All night long, he'd had the dirtiest fucking dreams, and Cas was gone by the time he woke up, which just made him feel sad and alone.

Dean scrubbed some shampoo through his hair as he glanced down at his semi-erect cock and sighed. "I hear ya, buddy," he muttered. He rinsed his hair quickly and washed up before letting his soapy hand slip up and down his length. It was a half-hearted attempt, more habit than anything. He wasn't sure how he could be both horny and not in the mood at the same time.

Regardless, his dick seemed to be showing interest, so he closed his eyes and tried to think of a scenario that might do it for him.

_Cas stripping his clothes off with those fucking angel powers. Slamming him face-first against the shower wall as he bound his wrists behind his back. Cas biting down hard on his shoulder as he entered him. That stern, gravelly voice snarling, 'Who do you belong to, Dean?'_

Dean squeezed his eyes closed and slumped against the wall, watching the mess swirl down the drain with the water. After taking a few minutes to calm his breathing, he cleaned up and got dressed, then headed downstairs to join Sam.

The drive was a long one today. It was nearly four hours to the town where they were tracking a djinn, and Dean could only fill the silence with so much music.

"So what's up with Cas? " Sam asked earnestly. "I haven't seen him in a few days. And the few times I _have_ seen him, he's been acting really weird."

He had hoped to avoid talking about Cas, but Dean knew it was inevitable.  He also knew Sam wouldn't leave him alone until he gave him a solid answer.

"He was there last night, " Dean said flatly.

Sam frowned. "Everything okay with you two?"

Dean just shook his head. "I don't know. I think so. Things are just weird right now. I don't wanna talk about it. "

"You sure?"

"Yeah," Dean said. "Way more TMI than you wanna know," he smirked to himself.

Sam shrugged. "Well, if you change your mind..."

"Thanks." Dean turned up the radio to avoid any further questions. The blaring tones of AC/DC were a brief distraction, but Dean could feel the awkward tension in the air as Sam struggled to keep his mouth shut.

"You're his submissive, aren't you? " Sam finally blurted.

"What?" Dean nearly drove off the road. "What the fuck are you talking about? "

Sam just chuckled quietly. "Sorry. I'm just saying, if you need advice, maybe I can help."

Dean stared a little longer than was probably safe while he was behind the wheel. He could feel his face reddening, but he was also intrigued as to what the hell Sam was implying.

"What do you mean? " he finally asked. This was already awkward. It wasn't their style to talk about sex-related things, aside from maybe bragging a little when they'd had a decent hookup.

Sam shrugged nonchalantly. While he didn't really want to think about Dean's sex life - especially his sex life with _Cas_ - it was obvious that something was 'off' between the two of them lately.  And since his brother could be an emotionally stunted bastard at times... well, if Dean couldn't talk to Cas about it, then maybe he could at least give him some advice.

"You know what I'm talking about. I'm just saying, if you want some advice..."

Dean snorted. "Thanks Sammy, but I don't think this is something you're qualified to give advice on. "

"Dean," Sam sighed.  "I didn't plan on telling you this, but I worked in a dungeon while I was at college. I might know a thing or two. "

This time Dean _did_ pull the car off the road, slamming the brakes until they stopped.

"Dude, what the fuck?" he asked, face twisted in a mixture of confusion and awe. He turned the radio off so that he could think straight.

Sam laughed nervously. "Well it's not something I'd usually talk to you about, but uh, yeah. You've been a little lost the last few days. And I remember something about a collar from that night in the motel... plus I overheard you guys one night..." He grimaced. "Fuck, you're loud. Anyway, I mean it, Dean. If I can help..."

Dean shook his head in disbelief and eased Baby back onto the road. "I appreciate it, Sammy, but this is just too weird. Even for us. And we've cornered the market on weird."

"Are you dropping? " Sam interrupted. "I have some Omega supplements that you should take... and you really need to talk to Cas about it. I know you're not good at expressing your feelings, but he needs to know."

"I'm not dropping," Dean insisted.

"Really Dean, it's nothing to be ashamed of. It happens to a lot of submissives. It's just a result of brain chemicals..."

Dean sighed, frustrated. "I'm not dropping, Sam!" he yelled. He sat there silently for a bit, staring blankly at the road ahead. "Cas is," he finally managed.

Sam's jaw dropped slightly as he stared. "Oh."  He took a deep breath as he changed gears.  "Okay. Well, look, it's not your fault, you know. You didn't do anything to make this happen."

"Sam!  Really. I don't think I can deal with this conversation right now!"

Sam sighed and nodded, turning his head to look out his window.

They drove in silence for a while, with Dean now feeling guilty as shit for snapping at him. He knew Sam was trying to help but _holyfuckingshit_ , he was not ready to find out his brother was even kinkier than he was.

"How the hell did you wind up working there?" he finally mumbled.

Sam smiled, though his face was flaming red. "Jess, I suppose. She was into some kinky shit. She took me there one day and uh. I don't know. She got off on me..." he cleared his throat nervously. "Doing stuff to other people. So we got to be regulars there, and one day someone offered me a job."

Dean didn't want to know, and yet he was curious as hell. "So you were like..." he paused, struggling to say the words. "A professional Dom?"

"I don't know about 'professional', but that's what I got paid to do, yes." He ran a hand through his hair anxiously.

"Huh," Dean responded thoughtfully. He turned the radio back on, quietly this time, hoping some decent tunes would calm his nerves. "You ever drop?" he asked quietly.

"No. I had to be trained and shit though, Dean. And I had experienced people to talk to if things got confusing. Plus, you probably don't know, but things are generally a bit less intense at a dungeon than in a relationship. I mean, I had some regulars, but I also had a lot of randoms. Are you guys trying to figure it out on your own?"

"Kind of, " Dean muttered. "I've been to a dungeon a few times. And I've had a few kinky hookups. But I've never tried anything like this in terms of a..." he sighed. "A relationship. "

Sam nodded sympathetically. "What about Cas? " He cringed a little internally, knowing he could never look at Cas the same again.

Dean took a moment to be thankful that Sam didn't question him being in a dungeon.  "He's never done this before. He's damn good at it, but he's never done it."

"Hmm. Must have done his research. "

Dean nodded. "He did."

"Well, research is good, but it doesn't equal experience. Want me to talk to him? "

"No! God no! I shouldn't be telling you this at all!" Dean exclaimed. "Why the hell am I still talking?"

Sam laughed. "I'm just saying, Dom drop can be pretty serious. He could be going through a lot of guilt and depression... if you're worried about him, tell me and I'll do what I can, alright?"

Dean nodded solemnly. "Can we change the subject now? And if we could never talk about you being a Dom again, that would be great too. Like I'm not messed up enough? Now _that's_ gonna haunt my dreams."

Sam grinned. "Sure, Dean." He turned up the radio and started belting out the lyrics to 'Thunderstruck', nudging Dean in an attempt to get him to lighten up.

Dean welcomed the distraction, and within seconds he began singing along too. "...they blew our minds, and I was shaking at the knees, could I come again please? Yeah them ladies were too kind... You've been _Thunderstruck_..." he wailed along with Sam as the tension slowly drained out of the car.  
  
:::::::::::::::::::::

It was late when they finally arrived back at the bunker, and Dean was still feeling a little woozy.  He'd been poisoned by the stupid djinn, but he was recovering, thanks to the antidote and Sam's quick thinking. Cas was waiting in the library when they arrived, and he immediately rushed to Dean's side.

"What happened? " he demanded.

"I'm fine, Cas. Got touched by a djinn, but Sammy gave me the antidote. Just a little tired and shaky, that's all."

Cas frowned, not entirely convinced. "Are you alright, Sam? " he asked.

"Aside from needing a shower to get the djinn blood off of me, I'm fine. Take him up to bed," Sam said, shooting Dean a little wink.

Dean scowled at him as he let Cas lead him to his room.

Cas closed the door behind them and carefully arranged Dean on the bed.

"I'm fine, Cas, really," Dean insisted.

Cas frowned again and pressed two fingers to his forehead, and suddenly every trace of grogginess was gone.

Dean blinked in surprise.  "Right.  Been awhile since you did that.  Thanks."  He grabbed Cas's hand and pulled, knocking him off balance and yanking him down onto the bed.    
  
Cas laughed a little as he tried to right himself.  "You sure you're okay now?"  
  
"Yeah.  I'm good," he said, as he put his arm out and motioned for Cas to snuggle in.  "Are _you_ okay?"  
  
"Of course.  Why do you ask?"  
  
Dean glanced down at him dubiously.  "You _know_ why."  He felt Cas's entire body tense up as he spoke.   
  
"I'm fine, Dean."  
  
"Good.  Then make out with me," he said, nuzzling Cas's hair.    
  
Somewhat nervously, Cas kissed him, and Dean responded in kind, but by the time things started heated up, Cas was tense again.    
  
Dean paused and pulled back.  " _Cas,"_ he said, exasperated. _"_ You've gotta talk to me."  
  
"Dean, I just... I can't do this right now. I can't," Cas sighed helplessly.  
  
"You know we don't have to," Dean said, as he pulled Cas back into his side.  "But tell me why.  Tell me what's wrong."    
  
"I'm just... I'm afraid I'll hurt you!" Cas exclaimed.  "I'm afraid I'll lose control and do something stupid again and..."  
  
"Hey, hey," Dean interrupted.  "Cas, we talked about this.  You're not going to hurt me.  Look, we need to figure this out.  And I understand, really I do.  It might just take time, but you need to _talk_ to me.  Stop flitting off and pretending nothing is wrong."  
  
Cas sighed heavily, tears welling up in his eyes.  "I'm sorry, Dean."  
  
"It's alright," Dean shushed him, soothingly stroking his hair.  "I know you; You probably think a Dom needs to be strong all the time, but that's not really fair.  It's emotional for _both_ of us.  Besides, you're not just a Dom to me."  
  
"I know.  I need to get over this.  I just don't know how."  
  
Dean turned onto his side and nuzzled his cheek.  "We'll figure it out, okay?  Just stop disappearing on me."  
  
Cas nodded and moved in closer, burying his face in Dean's chest.  "Okay...  Can we just lie here like this for a while?"  
  
"Of course, Cas."


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So much smut in this fic. Geez.

Twelve days.  Dean had gone months without sex before - a consequence of life on the road sometimes - but twelve days suddenly felt like absolute fucking _torture_.   He'd become way too damn spoiled.  He knew it was completely selfish, but dammit, it was like an addiction and he was aching for his fix.

On the bright side, at least Cas had been around more often.   He'd been tired, lethargic and somewhat cranky lately, but at least he was there, and Dean was trying to be extra supportive.  He did his best to comfort Cas, through all the aches, and flu-like symptoms, and the occasional emotional outburst.

To be honest, he was surprised that Cas was experiencing physical symptoms at all.  His part in their play session hadn't been that intense.  Not to mention, he was an _angel_ , so he didn't expect him to be hit so hard by something so human as an endorphin crash.   For whatever reason, it must have deeply affected him. While Dean knew that the usual drop symptoms would eventually dissipate, there was still the lingering case of the guilts to worry about, and that was often more difficult to overcome.

While he was glad he was ( _sort of_ ) able to talk about this with someone, he was almost regretting telling Sam.   The way he kept shooting him these sad, knowing looks was driving him crazy.   He was also constantly leaving supplements from the health food store outside his bedroom door, which, although thoughtful, was getting a bit annoying.

The worst part was, even though he knew it was completely irrational, it was hard not to take it personally. Frankly, Dean wasn't used to being downright rejected when it came to sex.  Over the years, he had charmed his way into more girls' pants than he could count.  It was rare that he got a 'no', so the constant rejection lately was making him feel completely unwanted. He wasn't confident about many things these days, but his looks and his charm rarely let him down. Dammit, he was adorable, and if Cas didn't want him, maybe he'd just have to _make_ him want him again...

Dean zoned out on  the ride home from a hunt this evening, a million different scenarios running through his head.  He wondered how Cas would react if he just happened to be waiting naked for him on the bed... or what he might do if he coaxed him into showering together...

Sam interrupted his silent scheming, and tried, as always, to get him to talk about his feelings.   Dean managed to give him the barest of details - yes, Cas was taking his supplements, even though Dean wasn't sure they'd have any effect on an angel - yes, he was doing his best to comfort him and convince him everything was okay, yes, Cas seemed to be improving, albeit slowly.  That seemed to placate Sam for the time being, and they continued the rest of their ride home in silence.

As promised, Cas was waiting at the bunker when they arrived.

"Hey Cas, " Dean greeted him, fisting a hand in his tie.  He yanked him in close and gave him a long, dirty kiss. Dammit, he was going to get his angel back tonight come Hell or high water.

Cas drew back, gasping in a mixture of lust and confusion.   What in the world was that?  It wasn't like Dean to show such brazen affection when Sam was around.  "W...what was that for?" he stuttered in surprise.

Dean just shrugged nonchalantly and headed for the stairs.   "Gotta shower this shifter blood off of me. Meet me in my bedroom and we'll watch some TV."  He turned to Sam, who was watching this scene in amusement.   "I'm probably out for the night.   See ya in the morning. "

"Yeah.  Okay.  Goodnight. "

Cas stared after Dean, who was slowly stripping his soiled shirts off as he trekked up the stairs.

"So uh..." Sam cleared his throat.   "How was your day, Cas?"  he asked awkwardly.

Cas tore his eyes away from Dean's naked torso and shook his head.   "Um.  Fine, I guess..." he responded,  just as awkwardly.

"Dean says you haven't been feeling well.  Any better today? "  he asked, trying to sound nonchalant.

"A little bit," Cas said distractedly.  "Will you excuse me, Sam?  I think I might like to lie down."

"Yeah of course.   Feel better."  Sam shook his head as Cas started up the staircase.  Oookay, he thought.   That wasn't awkward _at all_.

Cas made his way to Dean's bedroom, but he hesitated as he passed the bathroom door. The door was slightly ajar and he could hear the shower running. For a moment he thought about what Dean might look like under that warm stream of running water. He licked his lips subconsciously, and without thinking, he stepped inside.

"Dean?" he asked quietly. He may have been a wannabe voyeur, but at least he was going to be polite about it.

"Cas?" a confused voice answered. Dean's head popped out from behind the shower curtain. "Everything okay?"

Cas nodded. "Yes. I uh..." He wasn't sure why he was suddenly so nervous. He abruptly realized that he didn't have a good reason for being there. "Sorry, I'll just meet you in your bedroom," he muttered, red-faced.

"No, wait," Dean called. "Come here, " he said, motioning for him to come closer. Cas took a few tentative steps toward him, and Dean reached out to grab the front of his shirt. He tugged at it, making Cas come even closer. "What's going on? " he asked again.

"Nothing, " Cas blushed. "I don't remember why I came in here..."

Dean frowned. "Alright. I guess I'll meet you in the bedroom in a few."

Cas nodded and turned around.

"Unless you want to join me."

Cas froze and spun around. "W...what? That's not why I came in here..."

"Never said it was. Guilty conscience or something? "  The look of longing on Cas's face made Dean absolutely giddy.  This might be easier than he had anticipated. 

"No! I..."

"Cas," Dean said, letting the curtain drop as he started untying his tie. "Take your clothes off. "

Cas swallowed hard as he tried not to stare at the wet, naked form in front of him. "Dean, I shouldn't. I can't control myself apparently, and..."

"It's just a shower, " he said innocently. "Come on, Cas.  Clothes off." Dean's wet hands slowly unbuttoned his pristine white dress shirt and Cas shivered as he shrugged it off his shoulders.

"But Dean, " he protested weakly, "you know if we're both naked something's going to happen, and..."

"That so?  Maybe we're just going to shower, like I said..." Dean unbuttoned and unzipped his pants and let them drop to the floor.

Cas's entire body was buzzing with anticipation as his boxers hit the ground next.

"Come on," Dean said, pulling him under the warm shower spray. "God, I've missed that body," he sighed as he looked Cas over, smiling to himself he noted his raging erection.

"This is probably not a good idea, " Cas repeated as Dean wrapped his arms around him and went in for a kiss.

"Why?" Dean whispered against his ear. "Because you're horny? " He pulled back and shot him his lewdest smile.

Cas blushed.  "But Dean..."  His resolve was quickly slipping each time Dean touched him.

"You're not gonna hurt me, Cas.   Besides, we're not playing.  No Dom-Cas today.  Today, _I'm_ in charge."  He raised an eyebrow playfully and he grinned as Cas's entire body flushed pink.

"I... thought we were just going to shower..." Cas stuttered.

"Mmmhmm.  Let me wash you."  Dean picked up a bar of soap and slid it over Cas's torso a few times, then drew him in close, wrapping his arms around him to do his back.  He set the soap down and slicked his hands up and down Cas's soapy back a few times as he leaned in for a kiss.

Cas whimpered softly. "Oh Dean.  I've missed you like this," he whispered.

"Me too.  So stop avoiding it," Dean murmured as he began kissing his way up the side of Cas's neck.

"I'm just so... mmm... afraid I'll lose control and do something... ohhh.  Stupid again," Cas panted.

"You won't.  I'll stop you from doing anything stupid.  And I agreed to the last stupid thing too.  We were both at fault, and we learned from it, okay?  Stop feeling guilty, Cas."  He coaxed his chin up to meet his lips again.

Cas relaxed a little, tenderly kissing back as Dean hummed low in his throat. Ohhh, those noises Dean made went straight to his groin. Dean seemed to sense this, because he smirked just before deepening the kiss, letting his tongue ravage Cas's mouth. Before he could stop himself, his hands were all over Dean's body, gripping him and pulling him in even closer. His hands slid from his face, through his hair, then over the firm muscles of his back. As his hands slipped lower, his fingertips dug into the tight muscles of his rear and Dean growled, frantically rubbing against him.

"Need you, Cas. God, I need you so much," Dean panted.

Cas couldn't take much more. Dean was wet and naked, writhing against him. He looked so beautiful like this;  his bright green eyes wide and pleading, droplets of water clinging to long eyelashes as the steam swirled around them. He was so desperate and needy, wanting nothing more than _him_.  Cas chewed his bottom lip apprehensively.  He might still be a little nervous, but he could do _something_ , at least.  He slipped his hand between their bodies and wrapped his fist around Dean's throbbing cock.

Dean melted into his touch, surging forward to kiss him again as Cas began rhythmically stroking him. He had been craving that touch for so long, but now that he had Cas here like this, it wasn't enough. He wanted, no, he _needed_ more.

"Cas," he rasped. "Fuck me. _Please_."

All at once, Cas's body tensed. "Dean..."

Dean intensified his actions, kissing and sucking and nipping at Cas's neck, making him whimper and gasp. He glided his hands over Cas's ass and squeezed, shoving their hips together.

"I'm starting to feel like you don't want me anymore, Cas..." Dean whispered.

"Ohh Dean, I do, it's just..."

"Then show me."

Cas's eyes suddenly filled with tears. "I... just can't yet. I will, Dean. I just..."

Dean took a deep breath to quell his frustration. "Okay... in that case, you just stand there while I do what I want to you," he winked.   He nibbled gently at Cas's earlobe, then slowly began trailing kisses down his neck and across his collarbone. Cas groaned as he went lower, nibbling little kisses against his stomach. "I mean, you can say 'no' of course..." 

"Dean..." he gasped.

"Hmm?" Dean's tongue licked over the inside of his hips.

"I can't take much more teasing..." he managed.  He had been trying so hard to deny it, but he needed Dean to touch him, _now_. 

"Good." Dean smiled to himself. It was cruel of him, he knew, but dammit, he was tired of feeling unwanted. At the very least, now he felt satisfied.  Cas _did_ want him, even if he wouldn't act on it.  He backed Cas up against the wall and shoved in close, taking both of their cocks together in a soapy fist.  Slowly, he began working them up and down as Cas gasped in surprise.

"Like that?" Dean chuckled.

Cas nodded, squeezing his eyes shut as his jaw gaped open, and Dean responded by shoving his tongue in his mouth.

Cas groaned and thrust upward into the tight curl of Dean's fist, savoring the way Dean's cock felt rubbing against his own. He loved watching the self-satisfied smirk on Dean's face each time he coaxed a grunt or a whimper from his lips. _Cocky little sub_ , he briefly thought to himself before shaking the image of Dean in his collar from his head. No, he had to keep it together. He couldn't risk hurting Dean again - even if he wanted him to.

"Still need you, Cas, " Dean purred. "I know you want to..." He jerked his fist a little faster and bit down hard on Cas's shoulder.

Cas suddenly felt the need to be vertical. His legs felt shaky, the shower spray was turning cold, and all he could think about was getting Dean on top of him.

Without breaking Dean's gaze, Cas reached behind him and turned the water off, and suddenly they were back in his bedroom.

Dean glanced down at himself, still naked, but surprised that he was now dry. Cas was staring at him with that lustful look on his face, so he shoved him down hard on the bed and maneuvered himself in between his legs as Cas pulled him in close.

"Kinda nice to get you under me for a change," Dean murmured. "Can I try something?" he asked.

"I don't care _what_ you do at this point, " Cas panted. "Just please..."

"Good. Close your eyes." Dean shot him a lecherous grin and reached under the bed. He dug through his weapons bag until he found the item he was looking for, then grabbed one of Cas's wrists.

"What are you doing? "

"Shhh. Trust me." He bent Cas's arms above his head and quickly cuffed his wrists together.

Cas's eyes flew open. "Dean!" He struggled for a second as he tried to figure out what was going on.

"Angel-proof cuffs," Dean said proudly. "Just relax. We're not going to do anything you don't want to do, obviously. But you're so worried about hurting me lately, I thought this might calm your nerves..."

Cas raised the cuffs above his face and stared at them. "But how...?"

"Easy. You don't get to touch me. You're going to lie there and look pretty while I have my way with you," Dean teased.

Cas actually laughed out loud. "Dean..."

"Are you in or..."

" _Yes_."

Dean hummed happily. "Good boy," he winked. Without wasting a second, he reached for the lube in the nightstand.  He worked some over Cas's cock, then slicked some over his finger.

Cas's eyes widened as he suddenly realized what Dean was doing.  At first he thought he might just rut against him for a while.  Then when he applied the lube, he thought he might get a handjob. But no - Dean was bent over in front of him now, fingering himself open for Cas to see.  It was the dirtiest, most erotic thing Cas had ever seen and all he could think about was bending Dean over the bed and fucking him senseless. He growled in frustration at the cuffs.

Dean paused and looked coyly over his shoulder.  "What's wrong, baby?  Big, bad Dom doesn't like feeling helpless?"  Okay, he had to admit, pet names _did_ feel right in the bedroom.  Cas narrowed his eyes at him, and Dean just gave him a smug look as he moaned into his own touch.   He _so_ was getting off on teasing Cas tonight - it delighted him that Cas had so little patience for it, and pissing him off always brought out that snarly dominant side.

"Dean, _do_ something!" Cas growled.  He was achingly hard and Dean knew he hated to be kept waiting.  He was sure Dean was taunting him on purpose, and he had the fleeting urge to find the damn paddle.

Dean stopped and casually turned around, then shoved his chest back down on the bed.   "Don't you snap at me.  I'll leave you sitting here like this all night," he threatened.  He wouldn't really, but dammit, he was rather enjoying being in control.  He might _prefer_ being submissive in bed, but that didn't mean he couldn't be dominant when he wanted to be.  "I will use you for my own pleasure when I'm damn well ready," he sneered.

Cas's breathing was heavy with both lust and anger.  He knew this was all just a game, but Dean really knew how to push all of his buttons. Then again, he supposed he had it coming after leaving him high and dry the past few weeks.  "Yes, Sir," he sighed meekly.

Dean's face lit up for a moment.  "Good boy," he purred, giving his cock a firm stroke as a reward.  "I suppose I'm ready now. Now remember, you do not get to touch."  He straddled Cas's hips and grabbed his stiffened cock.  He adjusted his seat and slowly began sinking down on him, grunting and squeezing his eyes shut as Cas watched him, completely awestruck. He sighed happily as he rested a moment, placing his hands firmly on Cas's chest.  "Who do _you_ belong to, Cas?"

Cas grinned and tried to stifle a laugh.  "You, Dean."

Dean frowned.  "I don't think you're taking this very seriously." He began moving his hips, raising himself up and then slamming back down. They both moaned simultaneously and Cas reached for him with his cuffed hands, only to have them smacked away.

"No touching, " Dean reminded him.

Cas whined in irritation, but he had to admit, Dean taking charge was a bigger turn-on than he could have imagined. He never thought he'd enjoy being restrained, but for some reason, lying here helpless and naked, stripped of his powers was highly arousing. Not being allowed to touch was  absolutely excruciating, and for some reason, it turned him on even more. He stared up at Dean, watching him as he bounced, lost in his own little world as he took his pleasure. He was so rapturous and beautiful, Cas suddenly wondered how he'd lived without this for so long. And not just _this_ time, but the thousands of years he existed before Dean Winchester. All of those years wasted, they all meant absolutely nothing compared to this moment. He let his eyes drift closed as he reveled in the hot, tight sensation squeezing around him and the feel of Dean's hands caressing his chest.

"Cas?" Dean's voice suddenly pulled him from his thoughts. "You okay?"

Cas opened his eyes and nodded, suddenly aware of the tears running down his face. "I'm fine. I just... I love you."

Dean stilled his hips for a moment. "Didn't think you were so sentimental.  I love you too."  He leaned down for a kiss and Cas frantically nuzzled at his cheek. "But I'm not letting you out of those yet," he grinned, working his hips again.

Cas groaned and began thrusting upward, bucking his hips into that tight heat and making Dean mewl and squirm above him.

Dean reached a hand down to stroke himself as the pleasure continued to grow.  Cas's dick was rubbing just right inside him and he knew he wouldn't last much longer.  "Cas..." he whimpered, suddenly slouching forward as the little shockwaves began to rack his body. "Ohhh, fuck, Cas..."

Cas managed to slip his arms around Dean's shoulders, and this time, Dean didn't complain.  He snapped his hips faster and mouthed at his neck as Dean slowly came apart.

"Holy shit, Cas.  Oh god.  Fuck...  Cas!"  Dean yelled.  His vision seemed to blacken and blur around the edges as he came hard onto Cas's chest.  He paused to catch his breath as Cas continued thrusting into him.

"Dean!  Oh!  Oh!  Oh! Ohhh!..."  Cas whimpered and thrashed for a few moments before finally going limp on the bed.  They both lay there, sweaty and panting for several moments before either one of them attempted to move.

Slowly, Dean rolled off of him and reached for the handcuff key on the nightstand.  Silently he unlocked the cuffs and immediately Cas pulled him down into a long, lingering kiss.

"I'm sorry, Dean," he whispered.

"For what?"

Cas glanced down at the mess between them and touched Dean's forehead, leaving them both clean and dry.   "Come here," he said, putting an arm out so that Dean could snuggle in. "I'm sorry for how I've been acting lately. I don't understand what's wrong with me."

"Cas," Dean said softly, still trying to calm his trembling body.  "It's okay.  I'm telling you, it's just drop.  You seem a bit better lately though.  Are you feeling any better?"

Cas sighed. "I haven't been feeling so sad lately.  I guess that's something.  But just because I'm having a hard time justifying the whole Dom/sub thing doesn't mean I should avoid this altogether. I realize now how stupid that was."

"Well I'm glad you've changed your mind.  You've been distant... I kinda missed you," Dean admitted sheepishly.

"I've missed _this_ ," Cas lamented.

Dean yawned and smiled.  "You just missed my  _ass_."

"Yes," Cas deadpanned.  "And the rest of you too."  He rolled onto his side and wrapped his arms around him, gently kissing his forehead.  "I'm going to try harder, okay?  I can't promise the whole Dom/sub thing right now, but I'm not going to be so avoidant anymore."  
  
"Hmm?" Dean hummed sleepily.   
  
"I said I'm going to..." he chuckled softly.  "Nevermind, we can talk about it in the morning."    
  
Dean snuggled in closer.  "'Kay.  Love you."  
  
"I love you too."


	17. Chapter 17

The shrill chirping of the alarm clock woke Dean from a peaceful sleep and he groaned as he reached out to slap the snooze button.  He was so warm and cozy with Cas spooned up behind him that he wanted nothing to do with the hunt Sammy was sending them on today - especially since Cas was snuggling in closer and nibbling at his neck again.

Slowly, Cas had been loosening up. Over the past week or so, he had practically returned to his old self, and Dean was ridiculously thankful for it. Not only was it nice to fuck like rabbits again, it was also nice to see Cas feeling like his confident self too. Though he was bummed that they hadn't discussed the possibility of returning to their kinky habits yet, Dean was mostly content. Besides, as always, he had a plan.

"How did you sleep?" Cas's low, rumbling voice whispered.

"Really well," Dean murmured. "I mean, once you finally _let_ me sleep."

Cas chuckled deep in his throat. "I didn't hear you complaining."

"Oh I'm not complaining. Okay, maybe just a little at having to get up now. Must be nice not needing sleep," he grumbled.

Cas smiled sympathetically, and pressed two fingers to his forehead, healing his achy muscles along with his cloudy brain.

Dean shook his head incredulously. "You're fucking awesome, you know that?" he asked, giving him a kiss on the cheek. "You wanna come with us, or do you have somewhere to be today? "

"There are a few things I want to look into. Some angel rumblings. Probably not important, but I want to check it out. Will you be driving home tonight?"

"Nah, it's too far. We should be back tomorrow. Early afternoon, maybe." Dean yawned and stretched as he stood, shedding the blanket that had been covering him. He turned around and waggled his eyebrows at Cas, wiggling his hips and showing off his usual morning erection.

Cas grinned and rolled his eyes. "You're insatiable. "

"You love it. "

"Yeah, Cas sighed. "I do. Stop teasing me and get dressed already." He stood up and stretched, reaching for his boxer shorts which were strewn haphazardly about the room with his other clothes.

"But teasing you is so much fun. You get all grumpy and snarly... It's kinda hot," Dean laughed as he and grabbed a pair of underwear from his dresser and stepped into them. 

Cas sighed impatiently as he slid into his pants.  "Really, Dean, I find it a little disconcerting that you like annoying me so much..." His breath abruptly caught in his throat as he turned back around.  Dean was standing there wearing nothing but pink satin panties, an erection, and a self-satisfied smirk on his face.  
  
"What's wrong, _Castiel_?" he purred.

Cas shivered at his full name on Dean's lips, and he stood there silently for a moment, taking in the view.

Dean continued getting dressed as if nothing had happened, tugging on his jeans and pulling a t-shirt down over his bare torso.

"What are you doing? " Cas finally managed.

"Just getting dressed," Dean said casually, delighting in the way Cas's breathing had become heavier and at the glazed-over look in his eyes. He slipped a button-down shirt over his tee and crossed the room to give him a quick kiss.  "Guess I'll see you tomorrow then," he said, pulling away.

Cas growled, knotting a hand in the front of his t-shirt and yanking hard until they were face-to-face again.

"What are you trying to do to me, Dean?" Cas murmured.

"Nothing! I just like wearing these," he fibbed.  "They're actually pretty comfy once you get used to them."

"Mmmhmm," Cas hummed sarcastically.  "I can tell when you're lying, you know. What are you up to?" he asked, narrowing his eyes.

"Dean!" a voice yelled from the hallway. "Let's go!"

Struggling half-heartedly to release himself from Cas's grip, Dean grinned and made a kissy face at him. "You heard the man. Gotta go." He managed to wrench the remaining fabric from his fist and turned toward the door.

"You're intentionally teasing me," Cas finally sighed.  "You know how much your wearing those turns me on.   So you're going to wear those out while you go away, making me think about it until tomorrow? You're terrible. "

Dean glanced over his shoulder and winked. "Yeah. I am. What are you going to do about it, _Sir_?" He let the door close behind him, leaving a very confused Cas in his wake.

::::::::::::::::::

"Sonofabitch, " Dean muttered. His damn underwear were creeping up and Sam hadn't been more than ten feet away all night. If he didn't get a minute to himself soon, he was going to pick an epic wedgie whether Sam was there or not. It didn't help that they had been grave-digging most of the night. A little too much bending had the things halfway up his ass, and frankly, 'the boys' were getting a little squished too.

He threw his shovel into the trunk next to Sam's and paused a moment as Sammy climbed into the passenger's seat. Groaning in relief, he re-adjusted the damn things and slammed the trunk shut.

On nights like tonight, all he wanted to do was soak in a hot shower, but of course, the motel shower head would only spit out cool water no matter how much he fussed with it. He quickly scrubbed the dirt off himself and dried off, then wrapped a towel around his waist just as Sam started to pound on the door.

"Better have saved me some hot water," Sam griped. "My shoulders are killing me."  He might be used to the shortcomings of cheap motel living, but he didn't have to like it.

Dean rolled his eyes as he walked past him. "Pshh.  It never got hot to begin with."

"Awesome, " Sam sighed sarcastically.

As his brother took his turn fighting with the cold water, Dean rifled through his bag for some clean clothes.

"Goddammit, " he muttered, suddenly realizing that while he'd been busy teasing Cas, he'd forgotten to pack his boxer shorts. He glanced at the panties that were balled up tightly in his fist. _Fuck this_ , he thought. _I'll just go commando until morning_. He shoved the scrap of pink satin into his bag and pulled out his sweatpants.

He was nearly asleep already as Sam retreated to his bed, clamoring for the blankets to warm himself up.

"I've been spoiled by the bunker, " Sam muttered to himself, trying to fluff his lumpy pillow. He bent his knees to keep his feet from hanging over the edge of the bed.

"Tell me about it, " Dean murmured sleepily.  "If it weren't so damn late I'd just drive home.  But I'm fuckin' tired."

Sam sighed.  "I'm exhausted, but I don't think I can sleep."

Dean shrugged and snuggled up closer to his pillows.  Damn, he was really starting to hate sleeping alone.

"Things better with you and Cas?" Sam asked.  "He _seems_ better lately."

"Mmmhmm," Dean mumbled tiredly. "Things are good."

"Good." Sam adjusted his position again in annoyance as a spring from the mattress dug into his hip.

"'Night, Sammy," Dean murmured, giving the subtle hint that he couldn't keep his eyes open any longer.

"'Night."

Whereas Sam was prone to occasional bouts of insomnia, Dean rarely, if ever, had trouble sleeping. Within minutes, he was out like a light, snoring softly and drooling on his pillow.  At least after a long, tedious day, his brain usually gave him a break - instant sleep and mindlessly pleasant dreams that were a stark contrast to the shit he dealt with while on a job.

Tonight, of course, he dreamt about Cas:  _Cas licking up and down his entire body. Cas bending him over the desk in his bedroom. Cas cuffing him to the headboard again.  Cas blindfolding and spanking him for teasing him earlier._ And then suddenly, they were fully dressed,  Cas back in his suit and trenchcoat, standing right in front of him.

"Hello, Dean," Cas said tenderly. "So this is what you dream about..."

"What? " It took a few minutes before Cas's words registered in his mind, and even then, he was still confused. "Wait. Dammit, Cas, are you in my head?"

"Yes. Dreamwalking. Is it okay?"

Dean sighed. " I guess so.  Just this once.  Is something wrong?"

Cas shrugged sheepishly. "I missed you."

"Mmmhmm," Dean said skeptically.  "I missed you too, but I think you just couldn't stop thinking about my ass in those panties."

Cas glanced down at the floor, shamefaced.   "Well, no... I..."  
  
"Uh huh."  
  
"...well it _was_ unnecessarily cruel, you must admit.  And then to call me 'Sir' as you walk out the door?"

Dean chuckled to himself, fondly remembering the look on Cas's face.  "If it's any consolation, I'm not wearing _any_  underwear right now... _Sir_."

Cas's face flushed at a wave of heat washed over his body.  "Dean..."  He sat down in one of the chairs that suddenly appeared next to them, and motioned for Dean to take the other.  "You still want to do that?" he asked, sounding genuinely confused.

"Uh. Yeah. Why not? I mean, we don't _have_ to or anything. I'm happy with the way things are. I really am.  But I still think about it sometimes, yeah."

"But," Cas frowned, "aren't you afraid I'll hurt you? Or do something stupid again? "

Dean smiled and rolled his eyes. "For the millionth time, _no_.  Would you ever intentionally hurt me, Cas?"

"Of course not, but..."

"Right. So even when we're playing and you're," he paused and cleared his throat, " _disciplining_ me... look, it doesn't hurt that bad. You wouldn't hit me hard enough to _really_ hurt me anyway. Besides, that's what safewords are for."

Cas sighed, but Dean could tell he was at least thinking about it.

"So... what were you hoping would happen here?" Dean asked slyly.  

"Nothing in particular. I just needed to see you..." Cas trailed off, the little lie sounding awkward on his lips.

Dean huffed indignantly. "And here I thought you came to ravish me."

"Oh!  Well if that's what you were expecting, I don't want to let you down..." Cas winked.

"No," Dean hummed thoughtfully.  "I think I want to make you wait.  For now, you can think about what I wore today and wonder what I'm going to wear home tomorrow..."

"What? What do you mean? "

Dean shrugged casually. "I just have something new to wear, that's all."

Cas's eyes grew wide and lustful as he pondered what Dean could possibly have in mind.  "At least give me a hint!"

Dean shook his head, grinning at Cas's frustration.  "Nope.  Hey, you mean we can we actually _do stuff_ in here?" Dean blurted. "I mean, is dream-sex a thing?"

Cas nodded. "It is," he sighed, "but it probably wouldn't be a good idea anyway since Sam is in the room with you."

"Why not?"

Cas laughed. "Because your body will likely react in it's usual way. Grunting, moaning, climaxing.  And frankly, Dean, you're a little loud sometimes. "

"What?  I am not!"  
  
"You're _so_ loud," Cas grinned.  "And I love it."  He stood and pulled Dean up from his chair and wrapped his arms tightly around his waist.    
  
Dean pressed their lips together in that comfortable, lazy way that had become as natural as breathing.  As Cas's tongue slipped across the seam of his lips, coaxing them apart, he had a brief, fleeting thought -  just a few months ago, he never would have imagined himself here, with _Cas_. And now, after all the denial, the coming to terms with his sexuality, and the occasional freakout, this had become... _easy_.  It was slowly becoming harder to remember how he ever lived without this feeling of simple bliss.  Just kissing him sent warm little tingles singing through his body; it was a feeling he'd never felt before with anyone else, and he'd come to crave it.   
  
"It's because your soul and my grace are mingling," Cas said as he pulled away.  "The tingles, I mean."  
  
Dean nearly snorted in surprise.  "Dammit, I forgot you're in my head.  Oh fuck this is weird."    
  
Cas smiled.  "I'll let you sleep now, Dean.  I have some things to do in the morning, but I'll see you in the afternoon, yes?"   
  
Dean nodded.  The sexual tension still hung heavy in the air, but he wasn't about to give in now.  He was having entirely too much fun with this.  "Probably.  We'll hit the road early, and stop for lunch at some point.  You should join us.  I'll call you when we're on the road and see if you can come."  
  
"Sounds good."  Cas kissed his cheek and turned to walk away.   
  
"And Cas?"   
  
"Hmm?"  
  
"They're red."


	18. Chapter 18

Despite the uncomfortable mattress and the lumpy pillow, Dean awoke feeling calm and refreshed. He suspected Cas might have something to do with that too, and he was definitely not complaining, especially after Sam woke up looking like crap.

"God, that bed sucks. I couldn't sleep and I ache everywhere.  Not to mention you were talking in your sleep half the night."

"Oh?  What did I say?"

Sam shrugged.  "I don't know, it was creepy.   Mumbling mostly.   And a few little moaning mentions of _Caaaas_ ," he said in a mocking tone.

"Oh shut up," Dean said, rolling his eyes.  "You're just pissed that  _you're_ not getting laid."

Sam paused.  "Actually... yeah," he sighed.  "Irrelevant. "Let's just get on the road."

Dean smirked and headed to the bathroom to change. Usually he would just get dressed wherever, but he was about to slip into something red and lacy and he sure as hell didn't want Sam to get a glimpse of that.

"Speaking of Cas," he called out from beyond the bathroom door, "I told him I'd call when we stop for lunch. See if he wants to join us. Hope that's cool. "

"Yeah, of course, " Sam replied.

Dean took a long look at himself in the mirror, laughing a little as he shook his head.  Goddamn, he was a kinky bastard. He pulled the tag off of the new panties and stepped into them, smoothing them over his hips. He looked to the mirror again and studied himself carefully, turning around to check out his ass, then back to admire the way they accentuated his package.

They were red, lacy bikini briefs that he had painstakingly chosen and purchased online from a specialty shop that sold 'men's panties'.  If Cas was so into him wearing the damn things, he was at least going to get some that fit right.  He had been on pins and needles waiting for the package to arrive, driving to their PO box sometimes twice a day in order to intercept it from Sam's prying eyes.   Admittedly, they still looked like women's underwear, save for the nice little pouch on the front that perfectly cradled him instead of squishing everything.  He'd ordered a few different pairs, so he was really hoping they did it for Cas.  Who was he kidding?   Cas was easily turned on.  He'd really been coming around lately and dammit, tonight Dean was going to get his way.

He shoved a few other little surprises into his jacket pocket and quickly finished getting dressed.  While he was thinking of surprises, he wondered what the hell Cas had meant that night... Maybe he could weasel that out of him tonight too.

The drive home was a long one, three hours stretching on like days as Dean grew more and more anxious. Yes, he was really going to do this. In a public place, nonetheless. Poor Cas would never know what hit him.

As lunchtime grew near, Sam located the nearest diner on his phone's GPS, and Dean figured it was time to call Cas.

"Hello, Dean," Cas answered in his usual way, and Dean could already feel the butterflies rising in his stomach.

"Hey. Uh. We're going for lunch at a little restaurant on Highway 281 called Blue Plate Diner. We should be there in fifteen minutes or so if you want to join us. "

"I'll be right there."

"Good boy, " Dean said as he quickly pressed the 'end' key. He knew that calling him 'Sir' yesterday had got him thinking, and the more he could make him think about it, the better.  He focused harder on the road to avoid Sam's uncomfortable stare, and minutes later,  the Impala turned into the parking lot of a small local diner.  He stalled for a minute as Sam got out of the car, pretending to search for his wallet, and when Sam turned around to wait for him, Dean waved him on ahead.

Cas was already in a booth sipping coffee, and Sam was simultaneously poring over the menu and pecking at his laptop when Dean entered in a few minutes later.

"Hello, Dean," Cas said again warmly, sliding in next to the window so that he could sit beside him.

"Hey," Dean greeted him.  He grabbed the lapel of his jacket and crushed their lips together in a long, shamelessly dirty kiss that left Cas reeling and clutching at the table for stability.

"W...what was that for?" Cas wheezed as Dean finally backed up off of him.

Dean shrugged.  "Just missed you, that's all.  You okay?  Your face is awfully _red."_ He shot him a covert little wink, and Cas bit his lip to stifle a groan.

"Are you guys done mouth-fucking each other?" Sam interrupted. "Look at your damn menu so we can order.   And what's with the jacket?"  He motioned to Dean's collar, which was zipped all the way up his neck.

"I don't know.  Thought it looked good this way," Dean lied. He turned his attention to his menu, but he let his free hand slide down to rub Cas's knee.

As they sat waiting for their food to arrive, Sam made pleasant conversation  with Cas, filling him in on the details of their hunt, and telling him about this book he'd recently found in the bunker written in Enochian.   Even more now that he and Cas were... well,  _a 'thing'_ , Dean loved listening to the two of them talk.  While they'd gotten better over the last few months, Sam and Cas had always been slightly awkward around each other, though he was sure it was partly due to he and Cas's unintentional flirting and the constant sexual tension in the air. Today though, the conversation flowed easily, and Dean couldn't remember when he last felt so relaxed.

While the two of them nerded out on books written in ancient languages however, Dean couldn't help but tease Cas some more, slyly gliding his hand up to gently caress his inner thigh. He watched out of the corner of his eye as a blush crept over Cas's face and his leg twitched in response.

"Yeah, so if you wouldn't mind, I could really use your expertise," Sam finished, nodding a thanks to the waitress who had just brought their food.

" Y...yes!" Cas stuttered. "I... can do that." He gave Dean's foot a gentle kick under the table as a hand kneaded at his thigh.

Sam paused just as he was about to speak again.  "Are you okay?"

"F...fine!" Cas practically yelled as Dean's hand brushed across the bulge in his pants.

Sam shook his head and stabbed at his salad, turning his attention back to his laptop.

"So how's your coffee?" Dean asked.  He nonchalantly turned toward Cas and put his elbow on the table, leaning in as if he were fascinated with what he was about to say.

"Um.  It's fine," Cas frowned in confusion.

"Good," Dean stole a furtive glance at Sam, who was still sucked into his computer before mouthing his next words.  "You should fuck me," he silently gestured.  "Now."

Cas's face flushed, his eyes widened and darted to Sam before he mouthed a surprised "Dean!"

Again, Dean made sure Sam wasn't watching as he removed an item from his pocket and slipped it into Cas's hand, making him huff in astonishment.   He certainly had Cas's attention now, so he slowly inched the zipper of his jacket down just enough for Cas to get a glimpse of his shiny pink rhinestone collar.

"Fuck me," Dean mouthed.  "Sir," he added in a breathy whisper, inching a hand up his inner thigh again.

Cas was writhing uncomfortably in his seat now and Dean couldn't help but mentally pat himself on the back.

"I'm goin' to take a piss," Dean announced, standing abruptly and walking toward the restroom.  Sam glanced up and nodded before turning back to his food.

For a moment, Cas just fumbled with the leash that Dean had shoved into his hand, completely dumbfounded at Dean's boldness.

"Go," Sam sighed, not looking up from his computer.

Cas jumped at his voice. "W...what?"

Sam snorted. "I'm not stupid, Cas.  Just go... get it out of your system so we can have a decent ride home. I can't deal with you two flirting and slobbering over each other the rest of the day."

Cas's face reddened, and he opened his mouth to protest but Sam motioned him away with a wave of his hand.  He smiled gratefully and ran after Dean.

Dean already had his jacket off, brazenly showing off his pink collar by the time Cas opened the bathroom door.  He grinned as Cas launched himself at him, growling excitedly and slamming up him against the wall.

"What do you want from me, sweetheart? " Cas rasped against his ear. He was in a frenzied state, grinding their hips forcefully together and panting heavily.

"You. _Now_. Sir," Dean breathed. 

Cas snarled and pulled away long enough to clip the leash to his collar and to wave his hand at the door, effectively locking it. He wrapped the leash around his fist and pulled it taut as he lunged forward forward to catch Dean's lips in a bruising kiss.  With another wave of his hand, Dean was stripped down to those new red panties and before could even register what was happening, he was on his hands and knees on the cold tile floor.

Cas stood over him with the leash in hand, inspecting Dean's trembling body.  "What's wrong, sweetheart?" he murmured.  "You're shaking."

Dean chuckled softly.  "Just excited, Sir.  Love when you get all toppy on me."

Cas smiled and knelt, stroking his hand down Dean's head and back as if petting him.  "You missed me that much, hmm?"

"Yes, Sir."

"Mmm," Cas hummed.  "You actually did it.  Affectionate in public, begging me to fuck you in a public place...  You've come so far, sweetheart," he purred proudly.

Dean grinned and bit his lip in anticipation.

"And you bought these just for me?" he asked, sliding a finger along the inside the of the lacy waistband.

Dean nodded ferently.

"They're beautiful on you," he breathed.  "But you can model them for me later.  Right now I want them off.  Up on your knees."  With another wave of his hand, their remaining clothing fell away and he tightened the leash again.  "Suck," he commanded, guiding Dean's head toward his groin.

Dean eagerly threw himself into his work, sucking and licking and fondling all the while holding Cas's eye contact.  Within minutes his lips were reddened and slick with spit as he increased the suction and pressure, leaving Cas achingly hard and moaning his approval.

"Whoa!" Cas yelped suddenly.  "Ohh!  O... okay, sweetheart.  Stop before I come," he panted, tugging firmly on the leash and making Dean obediently pull away.   He took a moment to regroup and then nudged Dean back down onto his hands and knees.

"Such a good boy," Cas murmured as he knelt behind him, kissing a trail down his spine.  "Now let me take care of you," he whispered.  After a quick fingertip caressing between his cheeks, Cas shoved into him without warning, and Dean fell forward, completely caught off guard.

Dean grunted loudly and propped himself back up as Cas thrust into him, wondering what the hell he'd done to make it so easy to take him without a warm-up or lube.   _Okay_ , he decided, dating an angel was _fucking awesome_.  Cas was already pounding into him at a frantic pace, almost animalistic in nature, and Dean had never felt so manhandled in all his life.  Despite the fact that Cas was being fairly rough, he'd managed to angle just right so that he comfortably rubbed against his prostate, and it didn't take long before Dean was moaning and writhing helplessly beneath him.

"Come for me," Cas demanded.  He pulled Dean up to his knees and wrapped his arms around his torso, kissing and gently biting at his shoulders and neck as he continued to thrust.

"S...Sir?" Dean managed.

"No.  No touching yourself," Cas whispered.  "At least not yet."  He began snapping his hips a little faster, enraptured by the filthy, shattered noises spilling from Dean's mouth.

Dean let out a loud whimper as Cas began whispering more praise in his ear.  "That's it.  You submit so beautifully for me.  And you're going to come for me.  What do you say, sweetheart?"

"Ohhhh," Dean moaned.  "Y...yesss... Sir."

"Mine,"  Cas growled, slamming into him harder.  "Such a... good... boy..." he grunted, punctuating his statement with sharp thrusts of his hips.  "Come now, sweetheart."

"Fuck!  Oh... oh, oh... Yes!" Dean threw his head back and Cas tightened his grip around him, sucking hard at the side of his neck.  Dean pulled his head away long enough to glance down at his cock in amazement as it twitched violently and he began to come, completely untouched.

Cas chuckled in amusement as Dean suddenly went boneless and flopped forward.  He dug his fingers into his hips and thrust even faster now, quickly bringing himself to climax as the scorching heat in his abdomen suddenly became too much to bear.

As he gently released Dean's hips, he waved a hand, and suddenly they were clean, dry, and clothed in the back of the Impala.

It took Dean a minute to figure out what had just happened, but when he did, he smiled sleepily.   Cas was sitting next to him in the backseat of his Baby, and he clamored to curl up against chest.

"That was amazing.   _Sir_."

"It was," Cas sighed happily.  "I think we can stop playing now if you want though."

Dean nodded.  "Okay," he said, his voice wrecked and weary with exhaustion.  He hummed peacefully as Cas stroked and nuzzled his hair, and they both basked in post-coital afterglow for a while before either attempted to speak.

"Sammy's gonna kill us," Dean finally managed.

"No," Cas smiled.  "Sam won't even know we were gone long."

Dean beamed sleepily. "You're fucking awesome.  How the hell do you do that anyway?"

Cas shrugged.  "We just manipulate time," he said nonchalantly.  "We're currently in a parallel dimension.  I'll have us back five minutes from when we left.  So you can sleep a bit if you'd like."

"Awesome," Dean mumbled again as Cas raised his chin to unclip the leash.

"You're so sneaky," Cas laughed softly.  "With your collar and the panties... calling me Sir... "

"Well it worked."

"Mmmhmm," Cas hummed blissfully.  "I love you, you know."

"I love you too...  Hey Cas?  What was that surprise you promised way back when?  You kept saying you were going to give me a surprise..."

"Ohhh," Cas blushed.  "Right.  Well you may still get it tonight."

"Oh yeah?"

Cas shrugged noncommittally.  "Maybe..."

Dean snuggled in closer and kissed his cheek. "Who's the tease now?"

"Shut up and sleep," Cas grinned.


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks, guys. I <3 you all. It's another 4 a.m. insomnia post. Forgive me if I need to proofread again in the morning. Everything looks okay at 4 a.m., but I'll probably awake to a dozen typos or something. ;)

Sam looked up from his lunch, frowning as Dean exited the restroom with Cas in tow.

"That was quick," he muttered. "Seriously, if you guys start getting grabby hands on the way home again..."

Dean shoved into the booth and picked up the remains of his burger, that was surprising still lukewarm. "Just eat your rabbit food," he scoffed.

Sam just sighed and rolled his eyes. "I know I give you a hard time, but I _am_ happy for you two. "

"Yeah, yeah, I know," Dean mumbled.

Sam grinned and bit his lip as he tried to hold back his next statement. "So, you know Cas, I can give you some tips if you'd like... I mean, I probably still have some equipment you can borrow," he practically giggled in delight as he tried his best to make Dean uncomfortable.  

"Oh fuck off," Dean grumbled, though he couldn't help but smile a bit at his brother's glee. "Bitch," he added for good measure.

"Jerk, " Sam responded automatically. " Anyway, you guys almost ready to go? I just want to be home."

Dean shoved the last bite of his burger into his mouth and nodded. "You wanna drive? " he asked, dangling the keys in front of him.

"Yeah, sure," Sam said as he snatched them away.  "Wait. No, you are _not_ sitting in the back seat together. I saw the eye-sexing going on back there! I don't trust either of you anymore. Sorry, Cas," Sam added.

Cas just smiled. "Oh, I suppose I deserve that. Sometimes it's just so _hard_   keeping my hands off of your brother," he deadpanned.  "Especially when all I want to do is take him right here and..."

"Dude! Gross!" Sam yelped.  
  
 Dean howled with laughter as he caught the keys whizzing toward his head.  "Payback's a bitch, Sammy!"   
  
Sam huffed loudly and climbed into the passenger seat.   "Sorry, but you just lost your front seat privileges, Cas."

Cas grinned and crawled into the back of the Impala. "Fine. But I don't know how we'll survive. It's been _so long_..."

Dean caught his eye in the rearview mirror and snorted as Sam shook his head.

"I don't want to know. Just drive."

:::::::::::::::::::

As tempted as he was to just spread Dean out across the library table when they arrived home, Cas managed to make it upstairs first, for Sam's sake.  After all, he had traumatized the poor guy enough today.  He shoved Dean through the doorway, slamming his back against the wall as he pounced him in a flurry of kisses and playful bites.

"Clothes off, collar on," he rasped in a gravelly voice.

Dean was already panting hard and he hurried to obey.

"Usual safeword? " Cas asked.

Dean nodded.

"Good boy. I know I promised you a surprise, but I'm not sure you deserve it yet. Getting all toppy on me, teasing me at the diner.  That was totally inappropriate behavior for a submissive."

"S... sorry, Sir," Dean stuttered excitedly. He knew damn well he was going to get his surprise, but also knew his place when they were scening, so he kept his mouth shut.

Cas pulled away and lazily walked toward the bed.  He made sure Dean was watching as he took his time arranging the pillows, stacking a few against the headboard before removing his jackets and neatly folding them. He sat down and removed his shoes, and then his socks, never taking his eyes off Dean.

"What to do with a naughty sub..." he pondered aloud as he stood again. His tie came next, and he slowly unknotted it and let it drop to the floor.

Dean watched him intently, just shivering in anticipation. Oh, Cas knew _exactly_ what he was doing to him. Every slow, torturous motion was expertly calculated to drive him insane.

Cas continued undressing, removing his belt next, and rolling up his shirt sleeves.

"On the bed. Hands and knees," he suddenly commanded.

Dean obediently clamored for the bed as Cas bent to pull another shopping bag out from under it.

"I'm still very proud of how far you've come," Cas whispered as he ran a hand over Dean's naked body. "You've become so brave.   _But_ you should also know better than to try getting all dominant on me," he breathed. "So just a quick punishment, then we'll move on to your surprise, okay?"

Dean nodded.

"Today you're going to wear these," he continued, removing a pair of pink maribou feather-adorned nipple clamps.  "I got the ones that match your collar," he said, gesturing for Dean to rise up on his knees.

Dean flinched and hissed as each clamp was applied, but he had to admit, it was incredibly arousing.

"Down," Cas commanded, and Dean immediately assumed the position on his hands and knees.  "Such a good boy...  It pains me that I have to discipline you at all sometimes," Cas sighed.

 _Yeah, right,_ Dean smirked to himself, but again he kept quiet.

"On the bright side, there are two surprises, really..."  Cas removed a thin leather slapper from his bag and promptly began stroking it down Dean's spine.   "But first... "  He rubbed the smooth leather against Dean's ass in small circles, which would have been soothing if he didn't know what was coming.

Dean yelped as the leather cracked down on his right cheek.  Instantly, Cas was back to rubbing gentle circles against the spot, almost as if in apology.

"Two more," Cas murmured, snapping the slapper again in the same spot as Dean flinched and gritted his teeth.

This time Cas's hand smoothed over the stinging, pink mark on his skin.  "Good boy.  One more."

Cas flicked the slapper down hard, and Dean grunted.   _Fuck_ , that one made his eyes water.

"You okay, sweetheart?" Cas asked gently.  He grabbed his tube of aloe gel out of the bag and began rubbing it over the warm, reddened flesh.

"Yes, Sir," Dean panted, thankful that the cooling gel seemed to be taking the worst of the sting away.

"Good.  Stand up for me."

Dean backed off the bed and stood submissively, waiting for his next order.

"Your little fluffs are adorable," Cas smiled,  toying with the feathery puffs attached to the nipple clamps.  "Do you like them?"

"Y...yes, Sir," Dean stuttered.  "I thought they would hurt more."

"Some do, yes.  These are rubber-tipped so they don't hurt so badly.  I thought they'd be pleasantly arousing."

"T...they are, Sir."

"Good.  I can tell you're waiting patiently for your surprise,"  Cas smiled.  "Are you ready for it?"

"Yes, Sir. "

Dean watched breathlessly as Cas began removing his pants, humming impatiently in his throat as Cas took his time.

"Oh don't get _too_ excited. I'm just getting comfortable, " Cas said, as he unbuttoned his shirt. He left his boxers on and settled on the bed amid the pile of pillows.

"Sir?" Dean asked in confusion.

Cas ignored him, slowly propping and fluffing the pillows behind his back until he was in a comfortable sitting position. Finally satisfied, he looked up and smirked, then raised his hand in Dean's direction. With a flash of white light, Dean's body was immediately flung across the room.  

Dean yelped as he felt his feet lift off the ground and suddenly he was pinned against his bedroom wall, completely spread-eagle.

"Holy fuck," he whispered. He tried to move, but the only thing he could move was his head.

"Relax," Cas said softly.  "I won't let you fall."  He wiggled his fingers and tiny wisps of that pure white light shot toward him, swirling around his body like smoke. Everything they touched tingled like a warm, electrical current running through his body. He felt a few enter his mouth and he suddenly felt as if he were floating, eyes closing briefly as the muscles in his body relaxed.

"Ca...Sir," he fumbled.  Words were suddenly escaping him as the relaxing feeling grew.  "What's happening?"

"I'm letting my Grace touch your soul," Cas said quietly. "Do you like it?"

"Yesss," Dean gushed.

"Well it's about to get better," Cas said with a sly smile.

A small trickle of Grace skimmed over his neck, right in the spot Dean liked to be kissed and every nerve ending there suddenly lit up in shivery pleasure.

"Ohhh, fuck," Dean murmured.

Cas grinned and directed the wisps down his chest, letting them tickle and tease at his skin, and making the feathers on the nipple clamps flutter

"Still okay, sweetheart?" Cas asked gently.

"Yesss, Sir," Dean hissed.  "Sooo good."  He had no idea his skin could be so deliciously sensitive.

Cas waved his hand again and suddenly the feeling moved down to his groin.  Dean cried out in completely unfettered bliss.  "Fuck! Oh god..." he choked, the warm, tingling feeling surrounding his cock now, as the wisps teased him until he felt he was about to burst.

"How's that?" Cas asked with a self-satisfied smile on his face.  He was reclined on the bed, comfortably propped up against pillows as he eagerly watched the scene in front of him.

"Sir... I'm going to... Ohhhh..."

Cas abruptly pulled back his Grace and Dean nearly growled in frustration.  "Not yet," he said softly.  He sent the trickles of Grace back up his chest, caressing soothing patterns across his skin as Dean struggled to get himself under control.  Slowly, Cas directed the Grace downward again.

"Ohhhh," Dean moaned, throwing his head back in ecstasy.  Not being able to move was absolute torture.  His hips wanted to thrust, his knees wanted to buckle, but he was pinned securely to the wall.

Cas just lay there, calmly watching, but as Dean's noises grew louder and more frantic, he lazily thrust a hand down his boxers and began stroking himself.

"You look so beautiful up there, all restrained and spread for me," Cas breathed. "Look at me, sweetheart. "

Dean tried, but his eyes kept closing and rolling back as he was quickly overwhelmed by the swirling, intense feeling growing in his groin and abdomen. "C...Cas!" he cried out as the onslaught of pleasure became too much to bear. "Fuuuck! Oh shit. Cas! Yeah! Yes! Ohh fuck! Fuuuck..." He came harder and longer than he had in his entire life, and just when he thought he was finished, Cas waved his hand and he was suddenly hard again.

"Holy shit, " Dean whimpered in awe. He watched Cas through slitted eyes as he began writhing and pleasuring himself faster. The Grace started again, traveling over every square inch of him, leaving shivers and goosebumps in it's wake. He moaned loudly as they targeted his cock and already he felt like he might come again.

"C...Cas!" he yelled, all thoughts of staying in character long gone.

"Yes, Dean, " Cas purred. "Come with me." He waved his hand again and Dean's orgasm hit him like a ton of bricks. Much to his embarrassment, tears were streaming down his face, and he screamed in pleasure as he came again, making an utter mess of his bedroom floor.  His head fell forward as he gasped for air, and he glanced up helplessly at Cas.

Cas was still panting hard, but he managed to pry himself up off the bed.  Quickly, he cleaned himself up with his Grace and walked toward Dean.  As he waved his hand, Dean lurched forward, stumbled on wobbly legs, and fell into Cas's waiting arms.

"Holy shit," Dean repeated.  He struggled to speak, panting and laughing as Cas walked him back over to the bed.  "Oh fuck. What the... oh fuck."

"You okay?"

Dean nodded.  "What the _hell_ , Cas?" He was laughing and crying at the same time, and his leg muscles were still twitching occasionally from the aftermath of back-to-back orgasms.

Cas just grinned, removed his collar and the nipple clamps, then nudged him onto his stomach.  "Just wait until I do that while we're having sex," he teased, making Dean moan with excitement.

"That was fucking insane," Dean rambled.  "I've never felt anything like that in my life. It felt so... Dude, twice in ten minutes... How do you... what did... fuck, I don't even care."

Cas beamed and began massaging his back with the palm of his hand.  "You should see what I can do with my wings."

Dean moaned happily as Cas worked his thumb into a sore knot below his shoulder blade.   "You mean, like... _actual_ wings?"

"Of course.  What did you think I meant?"

"I don't know.  I've only ever seen the shadow of them.  I've never seen... I don't know, _actual_ wings."

"Hmm.  Well we'll have to fix that soon.  But not today.  Today you should rest."

Dean laughed weakly.  "Yeah, no offense, but I'll need a day or two to recover after that."

"Well, you don't _need_ to. I can heal you and get you hard again if you'd like, " Cas said, barely managing to keep a straight face.

"You're going to be the death of me, Cas " Dean rolled onto his side and snuggled into Cas's shoulder.  "Will you sleep with me for a bit?" he asked with a yawn.

"Of course. Get some rest.  You're going to need it."

Dean raised a curious eyebrow. "Oh yeah? What do you have in mind? You planning on plowing me into the mattress or something? " he asked slyly.

"Oh, eventually. But first I want you to fuck _me_."

Dean's jaw gaped open in shock. "Wha... seriously? "

"Mmmhmm. Since you like topping from the bottom so much... Maybe you need to top once in a while too."

Dean grinned. "Hmm. I suppose that would be alright.  Do I get to go all Dom on you?  Collar you?  Make you wear panties?" he winked.  "I have some satiny blue ones that would look amazing on you..."

"Anything your heart desires," Cas smiled. He paused, as if deep in thought. "You know, all this time I thought I needed be in control of everything. But when you took charge tonight...  I  _loved_ it."

"Yeah?"

Cas nodded. He ran his fingers tenderly through Dean's sweaty hair. "I guess I don't need to feel dominant.  I just need _you_.  Any and every way I can get you."

Dean tried hard to stifle a laugh.  "You're adorable when you get all mushy.  One minute you're paddling my ass, the next minute you're saying shit like that."

"Pssh," Cas huffed.  "Speaking of which, you broke scene.  That probably deserves a paddling or two..."

"Hmmph.  Well too bad you're going to have to wait a while now," he leered, grabbing the collar off of the the nightstand.    
  
Cas whimpered in arousal as he felt the warm strap of leather cinch around his neck. 

"Who do you belong to, Castiel?" Dean growled against his ear.

"Fuck," Cas gasped in surprise.  " _You_ , Dean."  
  
"That's right," Dean whispered.  "And I belong to you.  Let's rest for a bit."  
  
Cas nodded.  He pulled Dean in closer and nuzzled against his damp hair.   As usual, Dean was softly snoring against his chest within minutes, but Cas opted to stay awake, just holding him.  Though angels didn't _need_ sleep, they _could_.  Still, he had waited way too long for Dean Winchester, and now he was going to savor every moment he had with him.  He softly brushed his lips against Dean's forehead and Dean squeezed him tighter, making a sleepy little squeak of contentment.   
  
_Yes_ , Cas thought,  _this_  was what he had needed all along. 


End file.
